Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

[Studlover (imported)]

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

JERRY FALWELL:

Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't

you people see the plain truth in front of your face?

The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what

"they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that

chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will

become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we

sort out this abomination that the liberal media

whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the

other side." That chicken should not be free to cross

the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

PAT BUCHANAN:

To steal a job from a decent,hardworking American.

Dr. Seuss:

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a

toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it

crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:

To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to

cross roads without having their motives called into

question.

GRANDPA:

In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the

road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the

road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:

It was a historical inevitability.

RONALD REAGAN:

What chicken?

BILL CLINTON:

I saw it cross the road but I did not have sexual relations with any chicken!

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:

You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many

more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:

The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken

crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual

insecurity.

BILL GATES:

I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only

cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important

documents, and balance your checkbook and Internet

Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:

Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road

move beneath the chicken?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:

The road, you will see, represents the black man. The

chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him

and keep him down.

THE BIBLE:

And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto

the chicken,"Thou shalt cross the road." And the

chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:

I missed one?