Good *&%$^$! Morning, all!

[FianceeUvBigGuy (imported)]

Yoli here, endlessly complaining.

I got up at 4:30 and prepared to depart for a visit to the office...OK so far, right?

Then I bundled up in my best "Adorable Esquimeaux" togs and walked out the door. I then slipped on ice and bruised my not-overly-tiny hiney. I got up, cursing the weather, and made my way to my transport, deciding to take the Suburban rather than the Miata. I'd NEVER drive the Mangusta in this weather! It's not even mine though I have custody for a few weeks more.

For some reason I decided to inspect the long driveway that descends to the electric gate and I'm glad I did.

It seems the lawn sprinklers tinkled a short while ago and there's a sheet of ice on the sloping driveway that extends maybe 100 feet, to include a curve that is bordered by some huge rocks and a some large and ancient oaks, most within five feet of the pavement.

Sooooo...I'm stuck here which is actually just fine and/or dandy with me. There are lots of goodies...pastries, biscotti, etc, and I can always cook a nice b'fast. I'd crawl in with Ash(leigh) to console myself but she'd kill me. Something about icy feet irritates her. No idea why.

What DOES tinkle me off (a lady NEVER sez p---!) is that I went to the trouble of getting up, showered (skipped the swim), and all adorable in my winter gear only to wind up with my cute little derriere all bruised, my tailbone hurting, and my dignity badly harmed. I can't even get comfy to sit her and type!

All of which brings me to this: I know some of you live in areas that are enduring some serious winter precipitation and winds. PLEASE! Be careful, take no unessential chances, and be safe and warm. If you have elderly or infirm neighbors try to go check on their wellbeing. Make sure your pets are provided for, and know that I've sent a little prayer aloft for all of you.

And...STAY OFF THE $&^@! roads!

Love and Shivers,

Yoli

Can I get a make-it-all better smooch on my bottom, please?

(If it lasts an hour or so that's all the better!)

[AtlantaJim (imported)]

Let me be the first to give you a big kiss on that poor bruised hineyI am sorry your day started off so poorly. I hope it gets better and a nice soak in the hot tube some low light candles and a glass of nice cold chardony(sp) always cheers me up. Have a great day!

[Dave (imported)]

I had to call a neighbor to help spread rock salt on my driveway so I could get in the house yesterday. I had to go buy food. Today I cancelled my haircut. It's cold and icy out there.

[Paolo]

You southern people just can't cope with it, can you?

ROFL!

Sorry about your hiney, though!

[micropenis (imported)]

I was born, reared and live in Michigan. I am dealing with the ice and snow as well as can be expected, but my brass monkey is now a eunuch.

[StefanIsMe (imported)]

I like the bit about how you mention the cold and the ice, and then say "

the lawn sprinklers tinkled a short while ago

"... bwahahahahaha. My lawn sprinklers (if I had them) are / would be under oh... lemme go look.... yeah, about 4 feet of snow right now.

Three days ago it was -44c with the windchill... I still walked the 5 blocks to work.

Sorry, FUBG... while I do feel badly for your bruised bum, my frostbitten earlobe laughs maniacally at the image of you in your Inuit Togs taking an ass-over-teakettle tumble down the merrily be-whited lane .

[coinflipper_21 (imported)]

Yoli, I believe you. As far as lawn sprinklers in the winter go, here in Southern California, where we reseed our lawns with winter rye in October to keep them green all winter, we still, occasionally, (Like this week.) have to scrape the ice off our car windows before going to work. If your sprinklers are set to run in the middle of the night you can have a "black ice" situation in your own driveway when you try to leave for work.

[Losethem (imported)]

You southern people just can't cope with it, can you?

ROFL!

Sorry about your hiney, though!

You're right Paolo, they can't! Living in the south, I never go out there when it's like this. Not because I can't handle it, I'm more worried about the natives who have never lived in an icy climate. I've seen too often some bored housewife thinking that her 4-wheel drive urban assault vehicle/kid hauler in 4-wheel drive mode = invincibility!

I stay home because the last thing I need is those irresponsible people running into me on the road.

I thank Yoli for coming to her senses. At least she figured it out!

[Dave (imported)]

...

I've seen too often some bored housewife thinking that her 4-wheel drive urban assault vehicle/kid hauler in 4-wheel drive mode = invincibility!

...

I first time I saw that was 30 years ago when I started driving country roads home during the winter. I made it into my house and driveway by driving slow and sure. But those Jeeps, Jimmies and pickup trucks just forgot once they got started, the brakes didn't stop them. There was this hill that had a turn at the bottom and every week another one was slid off into the ditch.

And remember people - antilock brakes might stop you in TWICE the distance but that won't help if you tailgate or the road turns left or right.

Winter is BUMP AND CRUNCH time up here in Western PA. A body shop's dream!

[hazbalz (imported)]

Poor Yoli, cold tootsies and a sore hiney. I feel your pain, sister. Don't see how these Yankees put up with that horrid white shit that falls from the sky. And what's that crap about ICE! You crazy folks actually put on weird sharp shoes and run on frozen lakes!? The Lord made ice for Iced Tea! Geez, if I want ice I go to the fridge and push a button like any smart 'mercan.

At the moment it is 78 degrees and partly cloudy. A beautiful day in Dixie!