Domestic Tips

[JesusA (imported)]

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

[Arab Nights (imported)]

Amazing wisdom in simple statements.

Aviation sprouts some good ones.

The only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire.

Fuel is a good substitute for intelligence.

An aircraft is a defined volume in the air filled with money.

It it has tits or propellers, it will cause you problems.

Now we need Yoli go weigh in with Texas bass fishing wisdoms.

[Dave (imported)]

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

Sorry, in Pennsylvania, pissing the in the sinks is prohibited before midnight and after 6am...

unless you are a midget or a dwarf and then you may piss in the potted plants.

[Arab Nights (imported)]

I forgot one. Try to keep the number of landings equal to the number of takeoffs. Unprofessionaly, in my hang gliding career, there was an imbalance. The differential number is not large, but the style looms large in my mind.