"I wasn't always this impressive, I had to work for it."
"What do you mean?" Jim asks.
"Well, everyday for the past two years I've spent an hour each night rubbing it with butter. I know it sounds crazy but it actually made it grow 4 inches!, you should try it."
Jim agrees and the two say good bye.
A few months later the two are in the same locker room and Bob asks Jim how his situation was.
Jim replies "I did what you said, Bob but I've actually gotten smaller! .. I lost 2 inches already!"
"Did you do everything I told you? .. an hour each day with butter."
"Well, I was out of butter, so I've been using Crisco."
"CRISCO!!!" Bob exclaimed "Damnit Jim, Crisco is SHORTENING."
