Visitors Day At The Asylum

[A-1 (imported)]

It was visitors day at the Asylum.

All the patients were standing in the courtyard, singing "Ave Maria."

They were singing beautifully.

Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil.

A visitor listened in wonder to the performance, and then approached the conductor.

"I'm a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard"

"Yes, I am very proud of them," said the conductor.

"You should take them on tour," said the visitor. "What are they called?

"Surely that's obvious," replied the conductor. "They're the Moron Tapanapple Choir

[stevesd (imported)]

Well I live now in Utah, and the Mormon Tab Choir is on BYU TV and KBYU and KSL Mormon owned TV and Radio channel 7.

[JesusA (imported)]

Well I live now in Utah, and the Mormon Tab Choir is on BYU TV and KBYU and KSL Mormon owned TV and Radio channel 7.

And, will you listen to them in quite the same way after A-1's comment?

[Slammr (imported)]

A guy was driving down the street and one of the wheels came off his car. He was able to stop without much damage, but he couldn't find any lug nuts. He had no idea what he was to do.

As it happened, he had stopped next to the fence around the local insane asylum. An inmate was on the other side of the fence watching him. "Why don't you take one lug nut off each of the other wheels and put them on that one," the inmate said. "That will at least get you to a service station."

"Hey," said the guy, amazed. This was the last thing he expected to hear from an inmate. "That's really smart. What are you doing in there?"

"I'm in here for being crazy," said the inmate, "not for being stupid."

[curious_guy (imported)]

The Governor was visiting one of the mental hospitals in his state. While he was touring the grounds, a bird flew over and pooped on his bald head. One of the Governor's aids said, "I will go get some toilet paper."

A patient said, "They say I'm crazy. By the time she gets back with the toilet paper, that bird will be long gone."