Officially a eunuch 11/2008

[bfleish (imported)]

I am officially a eunuch as of 11/18/08!! My means of becoming a eunuch took much different track then most in this forum but I do want to explain what happened and to emphasize that even a simple orchiectomy can become a nightmare.

4 years ago I had a left sided inguinal orchiectomy due to urine refluxing into my testicle and it slowly killed the testicle over a period of 6 years. This resulted in unbearable pain. I asked to doc to take it out and instead he sent me to a pain doctor. Pain doc prescribed Topamax and Effexor. While the drugs did work to control the pain the Topamax turned me into a mentally clouded useless state. I was totally unable to function and I lost my ability to remember or come up with words while talking. Also the Effexor made me gain around 60lbs. I finally DEMANDED that the doc take out the testicle. So 4 years ago I became a 1/2 eunuch. No one knew at the time that I was taking Spiro and that I had really had the desire to go all the way.

After the first orchiectomy I began taking Spiro and then Androcur for about 4years and the results were amazing. Desire disappeared along with erections and most of the body hair on my chest, belly, arm pits and legs became peach fuzz. The only thing I did not like was the loss of energy. That was tough.

Fast forward 4 years and I went to the doctor for an annual checkup. Everything was fine but the doctor discovered an unusual finding in my remaining testicle. Cancer was the diagnosis and I was scheduled for surgery about a week later. I was so excited that I was going to become a eunuch but I was also scared of what treatments were in store for me to cure the cancer.

The doctor began the inguinal orchiectomy and when he examined the mass it it did not look like cancer. So he sent it to a pathologist who discovered the mass inside my testicle was nothing but dead tissue. The official diagnosis was a "Testicular Segmental Infarction". So 1/2 of the testicle was removed and I was put back together.

I was excited it was NOT cancer and there would be no need for radiation, chemo ect. But I was also disappointed that I still had 1/2 of a testicle and I was not a eunuch.

About 2 weeks after the surgery my T-level dropped to 30. I ended up having so little energy that I did not have enough strength to do much of anything. The doc did some tests and found that the testicle had stopped functioning and it would probably shrink up and die. I began using Androgel because I needed the energy to recover from the surgery.

About 3 months later my 1/2 testicle became infected and blew up to the size of a tangerine. An ultrasound declared that it was a massive infection and the chances of it recovering and working again was very slim. I was loaded up with antibiotics and pain pills and sent home. Then the infection spread to my entire urinary tract. I was really sick and the doc wanted to hospitalize me and do IV antibiotics to try to salvage what was left. I refused. I told him the only reason I would go into a hospital was to remove the testicle. Of course he refused removing it saying that one infection is not worthy of removal.

So the infection did clear up with the oral antibiotics yet it was still the size of a golf ball and was very tender to the touch.

3 weeks later the testicle become infected again. This time it blew up to the size of a large lemon. When the doc examined it he said "This is horrible we might need to take this out". I was once again excited to become a eunuch but my hopes were dashed when he decided to try antibiotics again to see if it would clear up. After a week of antibiotics it became even more infected. I had fever, chills, etc. So then I demanded that he take it out.

It took a very intense discussion with the doctor but in the end he agreed to take it out. His rationale for not taking it out was the tiny chance that maybe it would heal up enough and my fertility could return if I decided to father a child. I have no desire to father a child so my decision was quite easy. The doc really did not want to do the surgery.

The surgery turned into a nightmare. The testicle had fused itself to the scrotum from the infection. If I had waited another few days it probably would have fully infected the scrotum and turned in gangrene. It took the doctor 2 hours to separate the scrotum from the testicle. I awoke to intense pain and was pumped full of narcotics to try to calm it down. What was supposed to be a simple day surgery turned into 2 days in the hospital with major narcotics and IV antibiotics. I never felt pain like that. It was so far beyond my pain threshold that I shook intensely trying to deal with the pain.

I'm home now and while the testicle is definately gone the scrotum is very swollen and looks like there still is a nut in there. The doc inserted a penrose drain in the scrotum to let it drain the blood and whatever. And it drains a lot.

It feels very strange to walk with nothing between your legs. I know I will get used to it but it is strange.

I plan on continuing the Androgel until I have healed up completely. I need the energy from the Androgel to heal. Then I will slowly lower the dose and see how low I can go so that I don't destroy my bones but also achieve the goal I seek.

So while I did eventually achieve my goal of becoming a eunuch it sure was a long, difficult, painful way of getting there.

For those of you who are still intact I suggest you make sure you do a self testicular exam for cancer. You never know what you might end up with.

I'll report back later on my progress.

[Paolo]

I hope you get some relief soon and do take care of yourself.

Thanks for sharing this.

[kennath7 (imported)]

Congrats on achieving your goal

Hope you get well soon

[tugon (imported)]

Welcome to the EA family. Thank you for sharing your struggles with us. I hope you remain infection free and continue to heal. Keep us posted on your progress.

[randy (imported)]

HI! i dont have any balls either..... Hell none of us do... well some do but we dont hold it against them.

[bfleish (imported)]

Follow up. It has been 1 week since my orchiectomy. The doc removed the penrose drain yesterday. The hole from the drain is still draining quite a bit of blood and I hope that it seals up soon. Also there is one spot in the stitches where blood leaks quite a bit. The doc said to give it another week and if it is still bleeding he would cauterize it.

Even though the scrotum is empty it still looks and feels as though there is a small testicle in there. It feels like a triangular mass but in reality it is just blood and puss that has hardened up. The doc said it would take months to completely resolve and then it would be empty.

Hormone effects have not changed at all as I will continue taking Androgel until I am fully healed.

As I mentioned before it is very strange to walk around

with nothing between your legs. I know I will get used to it but it is

noticeably different. I didn't think about this before the surgery so I was not prepared.

I hope that my scrotum shrinks up quite a bit. I have a feeling that it may become really loose when warmer weather comes and it will stick to my thigh. I asked the doc if it could be trimmed up if I didn't like it. He thought that was a very strange question but said it could be done in a separate surgery.

The pain is almost gone but the itching from the stitches and the "haircut" I got down there is not fun at all.

I'll report back when the sack is empty and what decisions I make on reducing the Androgel.

Thank you for all your support.

[Hash (imported)]

bfleish,

When you decide to stop the Androgel, do so slowly if possible and consider using low dose compounded testosterone in its place. If you go off Androgel too quickly, you might nose dive into deep depression. I would also suggest experimenting with low dose testosterone, try to find out where you feel comfortable. I can't go below about 120 or I become extremely fatigued with no motivation and with depression. Do what's best for you. Hash

[mrt (imported)]

Sorry you had all that run around with the doctor. I know they mean well but yeouch... Anyway for anyone else reading this I would suggest you always be upfront and honest with your doctor. You may think they will flip out of their pants if you spell out your needs but its better then having them guess and screwing around.

Sorry to hear the non hormone you is underpowered. I started that way and life really sucked until I went on Androgel. Its no crime to appreciate the energy and mood improvments that HRT gives you. GOOD LUCK!!!:)

[SplitDik (imported)]

bfleish,

Out of curiosity, was all the testicular problems due to self-harm? I've had a lot of similar sort of issues, but all due to damage caused by self-harm. It seems unusual to me that you'd get all these sort of problems naturally. Just curious.

SD

[bfleish (imported)]

SplitDik,

None of the testicular problems were caused by self harm. I had been diagnosed with an inherited form of megacystis 25 years ago which probably caused the problems with my left testicle. As far as the right testicle the diagnosis of cancer was a total shock to me. But when the diagnosis came back as an infarction the megacystis could have caused that too.