Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
I'm out of estrogen and I've got a gun!
Life is short. So buy the shoes!
There's no right way to eat a Rhesus.
Beer is now cheaper than gas. Drink, don't drive! (thanks to Kevin Germain)
You are 98% chimp.
People who think they know it all really annoy those of us who do. (thanks to Judy McGuire)
Well, at least the war on the environment is going well. (thanks to Sarah Lang)
Jesus loves me, this I know - that is why I don't drive slow! (thanks to Elisha Cheverie)
Churches only worship the prophet margin. (thanks to John Wilson)
Don't believe everything you think. (thanks to Michael D.)
My feminine side is lesbian. (thanks to Justin Kinser)
Without geometry, life is pointless. (thanks to Ryan Mazonis)
Cats make everything taste better. (thanks to Gray)
Stable relationships are for horses. (thanks to Graham)
I've heard about the evils of drinking beer, so I gave up reading.
My gamer fragged your honor student. (thanks to Shaun)
The bigger the hat, the better the cowboy.
My dog is smarter than your honor student. (thanks to Gray)
I'm still a hot babe, but now it it comes in flashes.
National Spellling Bee Runer-Up
The winner of the rat race is still a rat. (thanks to Jake)
Sorry if I look interested, I'm not!
In case of rapture, can I have your car? (thanks to Ariana Moseley)
Custer wore an Arrow shirt. (thanks to Jake)
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
Alcohol and calculus don't mix. DON'T DRINK AND DERIVE!
Kids in the back seat cause accidents; Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
Money is the root of all evil. For more information, send $10 to me.
Excess is never too much in moderation.
My mind is like a steel trap. Rusty and illegal in most states.
To err is human, to moo bovine.
Don't believe everything you think.
Carpe Diem = Seize the day. Carp In Denim = Fish in pants.
The generation of random numbers is too important to leave to chance.
I don't think, therefore I am not.
Fishermen don't die, they just smell that way. (thanks to CW)
An Apple a day keeps Windows away.
This bumper sticker intentionally left blank.
What would Gandalf do?
Double your drive space. Delete Windows.
Resistance is futile (if > 1 ohm).
MOP AND GLO - The floor wax used by Three Mile Island cleanup team.
I'm Canadian. It's like being American, but without the gun.
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
Forget world peace; visualize using your turn signal.
What wouldn't Jesus do?
If you believe in telepathy, think about honking.
The box said Windows 2000 or better. So I installed Linux.
Use the best: Linux for servers, Mac for graphics, Windows for Solitaire.
To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.
Liberal Arts major: will think for food.
If you can read this, I've lost the trailer!
I didn't climb all the way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen.
Follow that car, Godzilla - and step on it !
My dog can lick anyone!
Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and name streets after them.
Gravity: It's not just a good idea. It's the law.
You - Off my planet.
I'm supposed to back up my hard drive, but how do I put it into reverse?
© 2008 compiled from many sources by Howard Daughters
