The teacher asked, "Harry, what is your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the
third grade and I am smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third
grade too!"
The teacher had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the
principal what the situation was. The principal told the teacher he
would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his
questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. The
teacher agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he
agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Harry: "9"
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Harry: "36"
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third grade
should know. The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think
Harry can go to the third grade."
The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"
The principal and Harry both agree.
Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Harry: "Legs"
Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
(The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
Harry: "Pockets"
Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants"
Teacher: "What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's eyes open
really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
Harry: "Coconut"
Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
Harry: "Bubble gum"
Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down
and a dog do on three legs?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and
before he could stop the answer...)
Harry: "Shake hands"
Teacher: "Now I will ask some 'Who am I' sort of questions, okay?"
Harry: "Yup"
Teacher: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do."
Harry: "Tent"
Teacher: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first." (Principal was looking restless and
bit tense.)
Harry: "Wedding Ring"
Teacher: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good."
Harry: "Nose"
Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver."
Harry: "Arrow"
Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot
of excitement?"
Harry: "Fire truck"
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put his ass
in the sixth grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."
- - - -
How did you score?
