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ITEM: The Republican chairman of the Corporation for Public Broadcasting is aggressively pressing public television to correct what he and other conservatives consider liberal bias.
-----New York Times, May 2
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Below, some PBS programming in the not-too-distant future:
Upstairs, Downstairs: Episode #9,983. The people upstairs get richer while the people downstairs stay poor. (Highly recommended)
This Old House Majority Leader: Master carpenter Norm Abram salvages Tom DeLay.
Sesame Street: Bert and Ernie open private Social Security accounts. Ken Lay tells Big Bird about his boo-boo and learns that everybody makes mistakes.
The Berenstain Bears: When Papa Bear can't afford to fill the family's Humvee, Brother and Sister sell lemonade to buy fuel.
World of Nature: Great strip mines of the West.
Learn to Read: From TV. See, who needs money for schools?
Frontline: The pros and pros of Alaskan drilling.
Now with Bill Moyers: Global cooling.
Dora the Exporter: Dora closes her father's backpack factory and out-sources the work to Bangalore.
Nova: Our 6,000-year-old earth. Tour the magnificent Grand Canyon, the result of Noah's flood, with host Ralph Reed.
Arthur: When Arthur's friend Muffy loses her first tooth, the tooth fairy puts $173,000 of tax relief under the family's Lexus.
Teletubbies: Tinky-Winky is publicly flogged after admitting he and Sponge-Bob were subliminally seducing pre-schoolers into a life of debauchery and singing.
Mystery: Who stole America's budget surplus? Miss Marple investigates Ted Kennedy, Jon Corzine and special guest, Willy Horton.
The Ever-More-Frugal Gourmet: Wal-Mart Workers Festive Feast. Bean casserole with crispy bean topping. Side dish: Beans. Dessert: Crispy bean topping flambé.
Washington Week in Review: White House press secretary Scott McClellan welcomes journalists Armstrong Williams, Maggie Gallagher, Jeff Gannon and an unidentified companion of Mr. Gannon's in chaps.
Antiques Road Show: Highlights include a signed copy of the Bill of Rights (later inadvertently impaled on a Shaker pitchfork).
Remember: This is Pledge Week. Viewers are asked to pledge abstinence until marriage.
[originally created by Lenore Skenazy]