Microsoft slogans

[Studlover (imported)]

Microsoft slogans

TOP TEN MICROSOFT NON-MONOPOLISTIC SLOGANS

10) Competition is good. 90% market share is better.

9) We're disappointed that the US government failed to reach a

reasonable settlement with Microsoft. We thought that our press

release last year about Microsoft buying the US government took care

of these little details.

8) We support a free marketplace. So long as our support is visibly

branded everywhere, at any price.

7) The Road Ahead: Revised edition, "How to avoid the sink holes."

6) When in doubt, spend gobs of cash on ads in all the major

newspapers on a one-day rampage against government. That always beats

befriending politicians and bureaucrats.

5) We value our customers. That's why we only charge $75 per question

on our toll-free tech support phone lines! (Hey, at least the phone

call is free)!

4) Just because our marketing memos effectively caught us with our

pants down and our hands in the cookie jar, doesn't mean we can't

bully our way out of this mess.

3) We love the idea of competition. That's why we bought a huge chunk

of Apple.

2) The US economy depends heavily on Microsoft's ability to release

software patches on time. Yeah, and that also proves how insignificant

and non-monopolistic we are as compared to our software competitors.

and finally,

1) No Netscape for you!

[Blaise (imported)]

These are too true to be funny.

[Studlover (imported)]

These are too true to be funny.

Ah! But here lies what makes comedy. Comedy is based upon truth.

Studlover