In the Year 2009

[Studlover (imported)]

The Year 2029

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh

largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and

livestock.

Baby conceived naturally... scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory

of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and

Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10

more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being over taken by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported

legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and

reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise are the keys to

weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter

speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil

rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly

swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January

2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political

contributions to campaign accounts.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

And last but certainly not the least...

Florida voters still don't know how to use a voting machine

[Riverwind (imported)]

I liked it. thank you

[MacTheWolf (imported)]

Studlover is a genius. If he runs for political office, he'll get my six votes.

[Uncle Flo (imported)]

Vote early and vote often? --FLO--