Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."
Bad habit
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Andrew (imported)
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Bad habit
A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of suckling his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon."
Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."
Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."
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colin (imported)
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Re: Bad habit
Goodness Andrew,
That must be about the oldest joke you have ever posted.
I have an old vinyl recording called 'Max at the Met' - featuring a British commedian called Max Miller. It was made on the night that the Metropolitan Music Hall (Vaudeville Theatre to you) closed down, circa 1957 and he told that joke. It probably wasn't new even then.
In the days when he was active, things were very straight laced and he was the master of telling risque jokes without saying anything which the most Puritan critics could find offensive. He does however, also hold the distinction of being the only star who had the the curtain rung down on him during a Royal Command Performance. I guess that the stage manager thought that he was too blue for the King and Queen, but they specially asked for him to appear at the next one.
LOL
That must be about the oldest joke you have ever posted.
I have an old vinyl recording called 'Max at the Met' - featuring a British commedian called Max Miller. It was made on the night that the Metropolitan Music Hall (Vaudeville Theatre to you) closed down, circa 1957 and he told that joke. It probably wasn't new even then.
In the days when he was active, things were very straight laced and he was the master of telling risque jokes without saying anything which the most Puritan critics could find offensive. He does however, also hold the distinction of being the only star who had the the curtain rung down on him during a Royal Command Performance. I guess that the stage manager thought that he was too blue for the King and Queen, but they specially asked for him to appear at the next one.
LOL
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Andrew (imported)
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Re: Bad habit
A fellow evidently under the influence was trying desperately to catch a train back to his suburban home. Three times he got on the wrong train. Each time he was told that he would have to take another train. When he boarded a fourth train he slumped down in a seat beside a clergyman, whose eyes, ears and nose told him that this new passenger had been drinking too much. He told our besotted friend: "Brother, may I tell you that you are traveling the rough and rocky road to damnation." To which the drunk replied: "Don't tell me I'm on the wrong train again!"
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colin (imported)
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Re: Bad habit
Andrew,
Q: Why, in Irish villages, is there always a pub or a bar next door to the church?
A: It is simply that they thirst after righteousness!
LOL
Q: Why, in Irish villages, is there always a pub or a bar next door to the church?
A: It is simply that they thirst after righteousness!
LOL