Bluenecks
Posted: Tue Dec 02, 2003 8:04 am
Bluenecks
Howdy Y'ALL.....This might make all us REDNECKS feel a little better...
ENJOY!!!!!
BLUENECKS are Northerners --- the opposite of Rednecks ...
You might be a Blueneck if ...
* Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call
them "you guys," even if both of them are women.
* You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
* You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.
* You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the
side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts) .
* You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce"
correctly.
* For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.
* You don't know what a moon pie is.
* You've never had an RC Cola.
* You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled.
* You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
* You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen
are on road trips.
* You have no idea what a polecat is.
* You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog.
* You don't have bangs.
* You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than at Six Flags.
* You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get
his own TV fishing show.
* You drink either "Pop" or "Soda"- instead of "Cokes."
* You've never eaten and don't know how to make a tomato sandwich.
* You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-'n-knife
show.
* You think more money should go to important scientific research at
your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.
* You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
* The last time you smiled was when you blocked someone from getting
on an on-ramp to the highway.
* You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
* You have more than one professional sports team in your home state.
* The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at
Neiman Marcus.
* You call binoculars opera glasses.
* You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side
of the road and stopping.
* You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob,
Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)
* You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie,
Johnnie, Jimmie)
* You don't have Maw-maw's & Paw-paw's.
* You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.
* None of your fur coats are homemade.
* You have no idea who the Allisons or Pettys are
Howdy Y'ALL.....This might make all us REDNECKS feel a little better...
ENJOY!!!!!
BLUENECKS are Northerners --- the opposite of Rednecks ...
You might be a Blueneck if ...
* Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call
them "you guys," even if both of them are women.
* You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
* You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.
* You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the
side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts) .
* You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce"
correctly.
* For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.
* You don't know what a moon pie is.
* You've never had an RC Cola.
* You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled.
* You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
* You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen
are on road trips.
* You have no idea what a polecat is.
* You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog.
* You don't have bangs.
* You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than at Six Flags.
* You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get
his own TV fishing show.
* You drink either "Pop" or "Soda"- instead of "Cokes."
* You've never eaten and don't know how to make a tomato sandwich.
* You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-'n-knife
show.
* You think more money should go to important scientific research at
your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.
* You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
* The last time you smiled was when you blocked someone from getting
on an on-ramp to the highway.
* You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
* You have more than one professional sports team in your home state.
* The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at
Neiman Marcus.
* You call binoculars opera glasses.
* You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side
of the road and stopping.
* You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob,
Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)
* You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie,
Johnnie, Jimmie)
* You don't have Maw-maw's & Paw-paw's.
* You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.
* None of your fur coats are homemade.
* You have no idea who the Allisons or Pettys are