Bluenecks

[Studlover (imported)]

Bluenecks

Howdy Y'ALL.....This might make all us REDNECKS feel a little better...

ENJOY!!!!!

BLUENECKS are Northerners --- the opposite of Rednecks ...

You might be a Blueneck if ...

* Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call

them "you guys," even if both of them are women.

* You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."

* You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.

* You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the

side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts) .

* You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce"

correctly.

* For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.

* You don't know what a moon pie is.

* You've never had an RC Cola.

* You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled.

* You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.

* You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen

are on road trips.

* You have no idea what a polecat is.

* You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog.

* You don't have bangs.

* You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than at Six Flags.

* You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get

his own TV fishing show.

* You drink either "Pop" or "Soda"- instead of "Cokes."

* You've never eaten and don't know how to make a tomato sandwich.

* You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-'n-knife

show.

* You think more money should go to important scientific research at

your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.

* You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.

* The last time you smiled was when you blocked someone from getting

on an on-ramp to the highway.

* You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.

* You have more than one professional sports team in your home state.

* The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at

Neiman Marcus.

* You call binoculars opera glasses.

* You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side

of the road and stopping.

* You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob,

Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)

* You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie,

Johnnie, Jimmie)

* You don't have Maw-maw's & Paw-paw's.

* You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.

* None of your fur coats are homemade.

* You have no idea who the Allisons or Pettys are