X-Men: Apocalypse
Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2017 1:07 pm
X-Men: Apocalypse
is like the 10nth? 12th? 3,294th? Marvel X-men movies.
It's the end of the world thanks to the very, very, very, very, absolutely, positively FIRST Mutant being raised from his 4500 year old tomb-whatever-thingie.
It's on a grand scale and we see lots of X-Men from the comic books.
Magneto is back. Storm is stormy. Quicksilver is really fast. Logan is stabbingly good. Nightcrawler prays. Beast shits on the lawn. Rogue ain't there, thankfully. and the Mutants do their things. Like Angel gets upgraded wings.
Lots of X-men action fun. Take the popcorn with lots of butter. Mutants save the world. Have a few beers. Mutants fight with all sorts of multicolor energy beams and fields.
And now I will tell you the contest I had with myself.
Early in the movie one character says to the other: "{did you think I was going to spoil the entire plot for ya? Think again!}" and I thought: "Now I know exactly how the villain is defeated and dies." Then I just waited for the movie to end.
Writers should never telegraph the endings of their movies. Viewers shouldn't be able to figure out a mystery or a suspense movie in the first five or ten minutes.
Now you know why "Dave craps on a movie," even an enjoyable movie and a movie that is lots of fun to watch.
is like the 10nth? 12th? 3,294th? Marvel X-men movies.
It's the end of the world thanks to the very, very, very, very, absolutely, positively FIRST Mutant being raised from his 4500 year old tomb-whatever-thingie.
It's on a grand scale and we see lots of X-Men from the comic books.
Magneto is back. Storm is stormy. Quicksilver is really fast. Logan is stabbingly good. Nightcrawler prays. Beast shits on the lawn. Rogue ain't there, thankfully. and the Mutants do their things. Like Angel gets upgraded wings.
Lots of X-men action fun. Take the popcorn with lots of butter. Mutants save the world. Have a few beers. Mutants fight with all sorts of multicolor energy beams and fields.
And now I will tell you the contest I had with myself.
Early in the movie one character says to the other: "{did you think I was going to spoil the entire plot for ya? Think again!}" and I thought: "Now I know exactly how the villain is defeated and dies." Then I just waited for the movie to end.
Writers should never telegraph the endings of their movies. Viewers shouldn't be able to figure out a mystery or a suspense movie in the first five or ten minutes.
Now you know why "Dave craps on a movie," even an enjoyable movie and a movie that is lots of fun to watch.