I was never threatened with castration. I was never abused in any way shape or form. Where my interest in castration came from has always been a mystery to me. When I was very young, about six or seven, I had some weird nightmares that I was being nullified. Scary as heck but at the same time they turned me on like nothing else.

When I was about 12, just about at the start of puberty, I found some family nudist magazines my dad had hidden away. Men, women, boys and girls doing completely nonsexual stuff. Camping out, swimming cooking hod dogs and playing volley ball. But I was hooked from that point on. Then I imagined that some of the boys and men were castrated or nullified and the mere thought was almost enough to send me over the edge.

I should add the my interest (not quite an obsession) in castration has always been a fantasy. The very last thing I'd want in real life is to be cut.

I have the same problem. I do not understand WHY. And probably there is no logical or rational answer to that. Most probably there is nothing to do with upbringing methods, molestation or abuse.

I've been fantasizing about cutting off my penis since I was quite young. I've had no traumatic experiences, and I can think of no logical reason for my desires, either.