Scared and Unsure,

Hello and welcome to the EA

I am only 22, so not much older than you.

Unfortunately sexual orientation is probably not changeable in most cases, although neither way has been conclusively proven.

I would definitely recommend that you speak with a professional counselor who has experience with gender and sexuality issues. This could be a much bigger help to you than you think. It could help you not only discover who you are, but maybe even grow to accept it and become comfortable with it as well.

Sexual orientation really is much less simple than just gay or straight. Most of the population has some degree of attraction to both men and women, even though most men in particular would never admit it.

Do you have any type of fantasies about women? Do their bodies appeal to you sexually at all? If so, then which do you fantasize about more often, men or women? If not, then you may very well be one of those very few with an exclusive attraction to only men.

Regardless of where you fall, you probably cannot change it, so a good first step would be to accept that fact. A professional can help you with that acceptance if you cannot do it on your own.

Now, there are some gay men who simply cannot accept their sexuality regardless of how much help they get, and they certainly have the right to feel that way. A few of those have turned to castration to eliminate gay sexual thoughts. While castration would probably eliminate or at least significantly reduce your fantasies about guys, I would under no circumstances recommend that you even consider it until you first discover who you are and see if you can bring yourself to accept it. You do not mention castration in this post, but since you are here chances are it has crossed your mind. Castration is a very extreme measure and should only be undergone as a last resort, especially when its purpose is to eliminate a sexuality you are not comfortable with.

Hope I gave you some things to think about, and I would be glad to chat further if you would like to

i was in a same sex relationship for 2 years, and when it ended i felt like i had been born again. i went threw an asexual period, and today find myself attracted to both sexes.

i am neutered and i think that also greatly opened up my perspective. i now seek love and affection from all, regardless of there "gender"......

unsure, I am 20 like you and have some worry of things as well. Don’t think that at this point in your life you have to feel any specific way, you are who you are and i bet that will change more than you think over the next couple of years.

ramses (imported) wrote: Thu Jul 26, 2007 4:42 pm I wish I could say that I was. I didn't have what it takes to make the 3 in 100 that try. My L4-L5 disc wouldn't allow it. If everyone knew what those guys go through (other special operations included) they would be lookat at as heros in this country instead of Lindsey Lohan and Paris Hilton. BTW, it's ironic that you commented on my avatar right after I changed it!

Actually the avatar was there when I posted. The reason I noticed, was one of my former bosses was one of them. BTW, they are demanding to work for. LOL

Sorry everyone to get a bit off topic at the moment.

wolfpuck (imported) wrote: Fri Jul 27, 2007 10:05 am Ok, I may not be the expert on gays but my friend sean is (he's great to snuggle with too) here is a link that i think will help. it's not really a choice unless of course you are bi and can choose wich one you preffer that day

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=traDM19Ag64

Thanks for this A very perceptive and touching presentation. I almost cried.

I used to be buy sexual when I was in High School but then one day they closed all of the whore houses... :shakemitk what a sad day...

I want to thank everyone for their helpful answers and suggestions. After reading your posts I went to my wife and told her what and how I was feeling, and I already feel like a weight has lifted. So very much appreciated.

Said something about threesomes... yay threesomes!!!

ScaredandUnsure (imported) wrote: Sat Jul 28, 2007 3:54 am I want to thank everyone for their helpful answers and suggestions. After reading your posts I went to my wife and told her what and how I was feeling, and I already feel like a weight has lifted. So very much appreciated.

Said something about threesomes... yay threesomes!!!

So how is it going with wife? Is she freaked out, or what? Hope all is well with you.