corrections

Post Reply
Dave (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 6386
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2001 6:06 pm

Posting Rank

corrections

Post by Dave (imported) »

>>SNL's Parody of Fox and Friends ran a series of "corrections" last night that flipped by so fast no one could read it. So some bright person transcribed to a list.

>>There are cruel, funny, and oh the essence of Fox's Morning program.

>>Did I say funny?

>>

This Week's "Fox & Friends" corrections, courtesy of SNL's tumblr:

Kentucky Derby losers are not turned into Ikea meatballs.

Dzhokhar Tsarnaev did not accidentally blow up vowels in his own name.

The chupacabra does not deliver presents on Cinco de Mayo.

President Obama does not want to take away T-shirt guns.

Most women have only two breasts.

The Memphis Grizzlies are not a gay blues band.

Scientology was not founded by I. Ron Man.

Bangladesh is not an 80s metal band.

Peeking at ladies’ butts is not a background check.

Actual crows do have feet.

Pot pie is legal in every state.

The California wildfires are not a soccer team.

Jason Collins was not turned gay by a Washington Wizard.

The NRA is not a branch of government.

Foreign visas do not let Russian students go on shopping sprees.

Rick Moranis was never put on death row for shrinking his children.

New York exists outside the mind of Billy Joel.

A French press is not lifting weights with your tongue out.

Lena Dunham is not a girl ventriloquist.

Number 2 pencils are not sad that they lost.

Plan B birth control is not masturbating.

Justin Bieber and Anne Frank were not an item.

President Obama did not just wake up in Mexico.

F.A.A. does not stand for “Fart A**, A**”

Croquettes are not female crocodiles.

Kanye West is not an African American vacation destination.

Syria is not Arabic for “serious.”

Rice and beans are edible. Ricin beans are not.

Casual Friday is not in the Bill of Rights.

Sam Adams was not too drunk to sign the Constitution.

The Gitmo prisoners are not working on their bodies.

Force feeding is not how Jedi’s eat.

Kevin Costner does not live in Watertown.

Smurfs are not elected.

Smurfs are not appointed.

Smurfs are cartoons.

Aretha Franklin and Patti Labelle have been in the same room together.

Anytime minutes don’t let you call the future.

4 and 3 are not basically the same thing.

Rock beats scissors.

Zach Braff is not the sound a trumpet makes.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/0 ... a&ir=Media
Dave (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 6386
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2001 6:06 pm

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Dave (imported) »

Dates:

May the FOURTH OF MAY be with you

Cinco De Mayo (with mucho tequila)

Revenge of the SIXTH OF MAY ...
Paolo
Articles: 0
Posts: 9709
Joined: Wed May 16, 2001 8:53 am

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Paolo »

For those in the printing business business, photo or not, we used to have a sign in the lab that read: "Cyan is not a country."

For those that don't know, cyan is a rich sky blue color, the opposite of red. Very few people outside the business seem to know what cyan is. A lot of new hires, back in the heyday of 1-hour photo, didn't know it.

In photo printing, from the days of using negatives and color filters, to control the blue level, a yellow filter is used. For green, a magenta filter is used. For red, a cyan filter. Red filters are/were used in B&W printing to control contrast. So if a print was too red, it would be printed at C+1 on the automated machines that were coming out in the mid-80's. The light source was fired through an automated filter pack with a C, M, and Y filter inside. How long each filter stayed in placed balanced the color.

Of course, Germany had Agfa Film (now bankrupt) and was decades ahead with Agfa in photo technology during WW2.

Just a bit of printer-geek humor there...
hazbalz (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 109
Joined: Tue Jul 04, 2006 7:30 am

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by hazbalz (imported) »

Great Dave! It scrolled by so fast I couldn't see a damn thing. Thanks!
Dave (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 6386
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2001 6:06 pm

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Dave (imported) »

Two pf those that I particularly enjoy are:

Number 2 pencils to not feel sad for being #2

and
Dave (imported) wrote: Mon May 06, 2013 8:54 am Croquettes are not female crocodiles.

They make me smile.
Losethem (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 3342
Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2001 9:01 am

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Losethem (imported) »

Dates:
Dave (imported) wrote: Mon May 06, 2013 8:56 am Cinco De Mayo (with mucho tequila)

I've taken to calling it Cinco de Drinko.

--LT
Dave (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 6386
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2001 6:06 pm

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Dave (imported) »

There was one especially for MOI:
Dave (imported) wrote: Mon May 06, 2013 8:54 am The California wildfires are not a soccer team.
Dave (imported)
Articles: 0
Posts: 6386
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2001 6:06 pm

Posting Rank

Re: corrections

Post by Dave (imported) »

Losethem (imported) wrote: Mon May 06, 2013 4:28 pm I've taken to calling it Cinco de Drinko.

--LT
Dave (imported) wrote: Mon May 06, 2013 8:54 am The chupacabra does not deliver presents on Cinco de Mayo.
Post Reply

Return to “Jokes, Links, Media & More”