Habituation, Dysphoria, and Orchiectomy

[Beau Geste (imported)]

Since the susceptibility of people to forming habits, is responsible for the character of a large part of human behavior, and also for much of the character of the way people think, it seems as though it's appropriate to consider the influence of habituation on matters relating to the main subjects of these message boards.

I think it's fairly well established by now, that some things which were once thought to be habits of mind, actually have a physiological origin--this seems to be the situation for the gay orientation in at least some individuals of both sexes. And that may well be true also for matters like the desire for castration which some people have, as well as for the general body dysphoria which now seems to be well documented as a mental orientation.

But, at the same time, I think it would be worthwhile to consider the possibility that some desires for castration, and some body dysphoria which leads to the desire for castration, might involve habituation. And even when an individual's conception that his body has the wrong features, is derived from something inherent in the psyche; it seems possible that the sense of dysphoria is heightened and comes to dominate thought, because the person simply gets in the habit of thinking about his conception that he is malformed.

Beyond that, some desires for castration seem clearly to be developed as a byproduct of sexual arousal. I would guess that a lot of the individuals who develop this type of castration desire, probably didn't have a strong desire of that type, before they developed a pattern of becoming aroused by the thought of castration. I think it can be conjectured, that the desire for castration is, for persons who develop a thought pattern of that type, a matter of habituation and of behavioral and thought reinforcement by the fact of repeatedly becoming aroused about the idea of having the gonads severed or otherwise taken away.

Some habits become sufficiently ingrained in people that the origin of the thought or behavior involved, appears to be forgotten, and the individual considers his way of thinking or behaving to be innate. I'm not suggesting that everybody who desires to have his testes removed, has gotten that desire through habituation rather than for some other reason. But it does seem to me that some investigation is warranted, into the degree to which habituation plays a role in the development of these desires.

Beyond that, I also wonder if the typical physical and behavioral patterns of persons after orchiectomy, or, more generally, after the reduction of hormone levels, might be substantially affected by habituation--or by the lack of habits. As an example, Mr. T's description of his attitude toward sex when his testosterone level was low, might be considered an example of someone becoming habituated to avoiding sexual activity. I also wonder if the reduction in phallus size after orchiectomy, might be related to individuals abandoning the habit of masturbation, which, or course, produces erections on a more or less regular basis. The loss of some sensation in the male organ, might also be something which comes from what might be described as habitual disuse of the organ.

[sheep79 (imported)]

hmmm that is alot for a poor sheep to absorb..... but I have to say BeauGeste has "raised" alot of good points. How much of daily life are thoughts or from habit? and how much are from??? hmmm...ingrained..and...genetic..???? I didn't say that as well as I would have liked but I hope ppl got my meaning....

[Danya (imported)]

I fear I may not adequately respond to Beau Geste's once again thoughtly, and very detailed , posting. Yes, these are good points. OTOH, in my situation, since I was a young kid I didn't really feel male and not quite sure I should be female, either. Yes, on first contact with EA, I found the stories extremely arousing. I think part of that is the stories addressed a real need I have to be castrated and naturally that would be arousing. Before I'd find the site, though, I'd done some significant self-harm to my scrotum and it sure wasn't a sexual turn-on. In at least some respects, my attractions to the stories was, I strongly believe, rooted in my own desire to be one of the guys that was neutered. Yes, I think this could strengthen the desire. Again, OTOH, just recently (as the result of a new med) I've felt an almost total lack of depression for an extended period for the first time in my life. And I feel now I can deal with my gender issues in a way that is not-self harming. To avoid that self-harm, I've absolutely got to take action to deal with my remaining issues. Part of that is seeing a gender identity therapist at the University of Minnesota. I started myself on chemical castration with the idea of removing the need to self-harm and it has worked. I'm over simplifying my situation here, but what can I conclude from this? I'm concluding that my possession of testicles, and remember I'm basing this on self harm that was not in any way arousing (and many years before I found EA) along with gender identity issues existing since I can remember, as evidence that I am not really male and being burdened with testicles causes my psychic pain. Since I started chemical castration, I spend little time on the stories but lots on the boards and in chat (with little of the fantasy chat). I've announced, before formally starting therapy, to 6 friends, including my boss at work!, that I'm dealing with transgender issues and I've felt totally comfortable with that. Today I told my 21 year-old neice. For me, at least, I genuinely feel that I have legitimate gender (genital?) dysphoria issues that have got to be addressed.

--todd