I recall my first time with a condom, I was 16 or so. I went in to buy a

packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful woman assistant

behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it. She handed me

the package and asked, if I knew how to wear one.

I honestly answered, 'No. this is my first time' So she unwrapped the

package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to

make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused.

So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty.

'Just a minute,' she said, and walked to the door, and locked it.

Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and

removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside. 'Do these excite you?'

she asked.

Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was nod my head.

She then said, it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on,

she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk. 'Well,

come on', she said, 'We don't have much time.' So I climbed on her. It was

so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I

was done within a few minutes.

She looked at me with a bit of a frown. 'Did you put that condom on?' she

asked.

I said, 'I sure did,' and held up my thumb to show her.

She fainted.

--

** I think fainting sounds a bit unrealistic. Slapping, or strangulation would be better.

I remember that I waited for a man attendant to show me the condoms when I first bought condoms at the drug store. He said, "We have single condoms, 3 packs and 12 packs." Well which should I get I said. "The singles are for that occasional need. The 3 packs are good for young couples to use on the weekend. That gives you one for Friday night, one for Saturday night and the last one for Sunday afternoon," he said.

OK then that is clear, but what is the 12 pack for? I asked.

He replied that, "Oh the 12 pack, that is for married couples; one for January, one for February, one for March and so on ....."

I just bought a single one and slipped out of the store.

I was emmberassed to buy my first condom. I walked in and looked around and then went red faced up to the pharmacist.

I whispered to him if I could buy a condom.

He shouted "NO! we only sell them by the box" just as a lady walked over.

I slithered out of the store and returned when it was empty, but I was still nervous.

I asked him how much a box was,

"Oh, we have a box of three for a dollar."

I told him I could afford that.

He rang it up on the cash register and announced. "With the tax that comes to a dollar and seven cents.

He said I gasped tax before I hit the floor.

I never imagined you needed tacks to keep them on.

I have 4 sons, my ex and I bought the condoms put them in this basket and told the boys never leave home without one. It was the don't ask don't tell rule.

River

If I recall correctly, River bought his first condom when he served under General Blackjack Pershing in World War One

I had a boy friend who wanted to have sex, and knowing how little control they had, i told him ok but only if you wear a condom, twice he went into the shop to buy them and twice he came out empty handed?

needless to say he did not get his leg over

MacTheWolf (imported) wrote: Sat Oct 27, 2007 10:22 pm If I recall correctly, River bought his first condom when he served under General Blackjack Pershing in World War One

Wasnt that back when they were making them out of fish bladders or sheepskin?

You can reuse condoms if you turn them inside out and shake the fuck out of them.

I would like to see a condom dispenser like one they have for bags at the supermarket, only mounted on a belt. anyways.. just popped into my head.

My nephew once did the "I have a date" thing with hints, winks and nudges. When I didn't way anything other than "good for you" he continued to hint at getting laid on the date.

Sadly disgusted, I went into my bathroom, raided my supply of scented adn flavored CONDOMS and gave him a handfull. His jaw hit the floor and he never hinted around like that again.

I guess that was too honest.