I've tried counting sheep, had a brief sojourn into the world of late night tv, heck, I even paid for a movie which turned out to be an education all by itself, but all of this was no avail. I am kept awake into the small hours with questions that just won't go away.

A Google search proved pretty useless. I even tried Turbo10 (that well known search engine of the underbelly of the www!) - nuffink, nada, nil, zilch.

The NYPD were all out to lunch when I rang. The Floridian PD were busy giving advice to CSI: Miami. The Texans were all putting coins in their electric meters. As for the Georgians, well, they were stupendously helpful until I mentioned your name, they then asked me for the 'codeword'. I opted to guess and said 'halloween', they hung up on me. And, as for the Colombians, well they weren't helpful at all, unless you include the fact that they offered me a free vacation if I would agree to meet some man at Heathrow airport and 'help him with his luggage'.

So, it's all been most unsatisfactory. I am developing a nervous tic of a personal nature, which runs the risk of getting me into all kinds of trouble.

I think there's every chance that I shall soon be diagnosed with an obsessive disorder.

As most of you will know by now, it must be clear from my postings on the EA, I am a small-minded, fairly bigotted person, I consider Fred Phelps amongst my closest personal friends. I left the Southern Baptists because they were waaay too liberal (but that's really another story!)

The point is, I clearly have enormous problems, that much must be clear for all to see.

My question to you is this:

Would you knowingly add to my neuroses by refusing to clarify the 'halloween' incident? Of course, it may well still be sub judice, in which case, pm it to me!

Come on, come on, I can't wait much longer. There are others here who know the truth (don't think I'm unaware of that), they, too, have remained strangely silent.

I've got two choices really. I can hold my breath and risk possible death if you don't choose to enlighten me (which could, in itself, be quite an exciting experience), or I can begin taking the anti-psychotics prescribed to me today by my doctor...

Over to you ...

I'm not quite sure what actually prompted Dingbat to write this post, but... ROFL!!!!!!

dingbat,

...loose lips sinks ships...

Trick-or-treat, smell my feet? ...give me something good to ingest...

To keep you all updated on my efforts ...

I have employed a private investigator. His name is Raoul Ramirez Mustapha Nigel Inkelstein but, because this is a bit of a mouthful, he prefers to go by the nickname of 'Red'. He comes from Morocco.

I met him for dinner yesterday and he gave me a few negatives which I'm still perusing and he also gave me a key (which possibly fits at lock at Slough swimming baths, this is yet to be established.)

Actually, I'm not sure what I'm paying him for. His information wasn't very illuminating. But he does a sideline in party costumes so there might be some mileage in him yet.

He will continue as a P.I. work on my behalf.

Funnily enough, this morning I met a friend who had also employed him. They weren't sure it was the same person at first, because I gave his full name. Eventually, feeling sure it was the same person, I said : "you must know him, Red, that's his nickname".

My friend said "Ah yes, Moroccan Red".

(and before you go blaming me for the content of this post just remember it was A-1 who said he wanted something good to 'ingest'! )

... to be continued.

dingbat (imported) wrote: Fri Apr 20, 2007 2:19 am (and before you go blaming me for the content of this post just remember it was A-1 who said he wanted something good to 'ingest'! )

... to be continued.

Methinks that Dingbat has just reinstalled Java and has gone a little hyper with all the caffeine.....

Those anti-psychotics were placebos. Your doctor is an author here.



A-1 is still spinning from the great azalea heist some years ago. That, and the vengeful ghosts from the old hospital building that was torn down. Rumor is that he's called an exorcist to rid him of the spirit of a teenage boy who was to have his tonsils removed, but A-1 - having partied a bit the night before the surgery - misread the surgical notes and removed another set of organs that starts with the letter "T". The young man then later jumped out the 8th floor window, and has been following A-1 around since.

I give up... either I am missing something or you are all psychotic. More likely - I am the psychotic....

Weirdest thread yet. Just when it all starts to make sense, I get totally confused.

Kangan,

Trust me ... it's not you!

Paolo wrote: Fri Apr 20, 2007 4:57 am Those anti-psychotics were placebos. Your doctor is an author here.



A-1 is still spinning from the great azalea heist some years ago. That, and the vengeful ghosts from the old hospital building that was torn down. Rumor is that he's called an exorcist to rid him of the spirit of a teenage boy who was to have his tonsils removed, but A-1 - having partied a bit the night before the surgery - misread the surgical notes and removed another set of organs that starts with the letter "T". The young man then later jumped out the 8th floor window, and has been following A-1 around since.

I'm very over-tired tonight and the anti-psychotics were definitely placebos but ...

It's very odd that you should mention the teenage boy and his tonsil episode with A-1. Odd because Raoul Ramirez Mustapha Nigel Inkelstein has always struck me as being a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic, I just assumed he was lacking in the neurone department but, now you come to mention it, he does carry a small bottle in his briefcase which he hides from my view whenever he opens the case. He also complains of a high-altitude collision with 'The Man from Ipanema' following what he describes as a 'snip of an incident' - does A-1 go under any other names that I should know about?

*looks around room*

is that pink bunny meant to be there?