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Lovemaking tips

Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 3:00 pm
by JesusA (imported)
LOVEMAKING - TIPS FOR SENIORS

1. Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting. Turn them ALL OFF!

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember it.

6. Keep extra poli-grip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed or between the thighs.

7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

(Notice: I sent it in large type so you could read it)

Re: Lovemaking tips

Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 4:59 pm
by Sara (imported)
That was a great one!! Thank for the laughs. Now when you start loosin your teeth in the middle of sex....yup it definately says something. LOL.

Re: Lovemaking tips

Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 6:38 pm
by kristoff
JesusA (imported) wrote: Sun Jan 14, 2007 3:00 pm 2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

Unfortunately, I got smacked upside the head the one time this happened. Never again.... Yes, dear!

Re: Lovemaking tips

Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 7:10 pm
by Slammr (imported)
JesusA (imported) wrote: Sun Jan 14, 2007 3:00 pm 2. Set timer for 3 mi
kristoff wrote: Sun Jan 14, 2007 6:38 pm nutes, in case you doze off in the middle.

Unfortunately, I got smacked upside the head t
he one time this happened. Never again.... Yes, dear!

I never dozed off myself, but I had a girl fall asleep on top on me once before I was through. I wonder if it was a statement about my love making, or if she'd just had too much to drink?

Re: Lovemaking tips

Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2007 12:29 pm
by tinydick (imported)
set the timer for 3 mins what are we doing it 6 times then lol lol