If any of you have been unexpectly "outed" re our "interest", I could use some experience-based advice...read on, please.

Yoli, The Odd Lady here.

Well, it had to happen sometime...

Some may recall that I've been engaged in a sort of competition with one of our senior partners. We make silly bets on who will outfish or outshoot/hunt the other. I am well ahead of him in all events and he's been pretty good-natured about being aced by a girlpuppy. Wellllll...now he has revealed that he knows about my lil' Kastration Kink (I tried Castration Cink, but, well, you know.)

Last night I attended a Holiday Bowl Party at his plush palace. There were TWO big HDTV sets in the "entertainment" room and one on the patio...wow!

As it became obvious that his beloved Texas Aggies (A&M) were gonna be anally assaulted by the Cuddly Care Bears of Cali. U. he began to increase his intake of of adult beverages. Normally, he's a gentleman drunk, even nicer and quite funny as he becomes increasingly pickled...There was a slight edginess to him this time though. Everyone noticed it and we all were a bit apprehensive.

(Please modify greeting above to read "RAINY and WINDY San Antonio". LOL!)

Anyway, I slipped out into a remote corner of the place to smoke a borrowed cigarette (yes, it had a NAME on it!). I smoke less than two a day. I DO admit that I CRAVE one after...you know.

Soooo, there I was, feeling a cool breeze ruffling my tresses, and then HE appeared in the gloom.

Dialogue: "So, Yoli, smoking? Don't you know it's bad for you?" (This, as he lit a $$$ cigar.)

Me: "Oh, uh, yeah...but really don't do this often."

He: "I see. Well, perhaps you have other vices, haha, we all need at least one."

Me: "Hmmmm...vices? Well, I DO like apple pie with crumb topping more than I should, is that a vice?"

He: "Oh, I thought you had some darker little thoughts."

Me: "What? Me? Like what?" That was a BIG mistake!

He looked me right in the eye, though it was apparent that he was having trouble focusing, and said...

"Yoli, do you remember the time you 'accidentally' saw me naked when you wandered down to the creek at the ranch?"

Me: "Yes, and I thought we handled that well. I apologized and scooted and you later patted me on the back and laughed it off."

He: "Yoli, I saw you skulking in the cedars. You stuck around to get another look, now didn't you? 'Fess up."

At this, I nearly passed out.

Me: "I, I, I, well, I was wrong to do that, but I HAD been drinking!"

Then came the words that nearly caused heart failure...

He: "Let's play Truth or Dare, no repercussions, OK?"

Me: "Uh, OK."

He: "Did you get a good look?"

Me: (Staring at my overpriced shoes.) "I guess so."

He: "Well, did I meet with your approval?"

I expected some sort of sexual advance at this point and so I saw both my life and career pass before me. But, nope.

Me: "You're a very handsome man."

He: "That's not what I meant and you damned well know it."

Note: This man is in his early 60's, buff as Heck, and his wife is a nice lady about ten years younger.

Me: "Look, if you want me to say I took a good look at your privates, well, yes, I did. If you want me to say I was impressed, I was, and that's the honest truth. Again, I apologize and I recall that we laughed it off."

He: "Yoli, I know about..."

Me: (Totally unsuspecting.) "Know about what?"

He: "I'll just ask one question. When you saw what you saw, or later on, did you imagine doing something to me, something involving some surgery?"

Ahhhh, now it was out! Now I DID have at least a minor heart attack. I wanted to die but decided to live long enough to be asked for my resignation to be on his desk on our first day back from the Holiday Break.

He didn't make such a request. Instead he said "Look, we will chat a bit more about your interest in THAT, but only because I'm curious as to what that's all about with you. I am NOT interested in the subject, per se, and am not going to involve myself in that part of your life. So, shall we go back to join the crowd?"

We did, his arm around my shaking shoulders, and he mixed me another drink. When the party broke up, he wished me a safe drive home and, with a sincere smile, whispered "Don't be the least concerned. Your private life is your own, but I admit I'm a tad curious...we'll talk later, OK?"

Now, the obvious question is "How did he find out?" Next, "How much DOES he know?"

Finally, and I pose this question in open forum..."How much DO I tell him?" I can't lie. He'd know it.

Somehow, I'm totally at ease with this, almost pumped. I know my job is safe and so is my secret. He's just too good a man to cause me any embarassment and grief. All that remains is to find a way to make him understand WHY I am the way I am and to find out how much he knows (and how he knows it!!!).

Sorry to ramble, but this is kinda BIG! Thank God he's the man he is.

Yolanda

C/O Coronary ICU

PS: Since I hate to end a post without one of my (in)famous attempts at humor...one more question.

What do think he'd do if I asked for another peek at his:dong:

This is a topic which needs more open discussion. Go for it! If you feel secure about other things, why not a frank discussion of castration. One need not get kinky in the conversation, just factual.

As to how he found out: Do you cruise the EA at work? Is someone spying on your computer use and online access there? Are you giving away too much self-identifying info on the EA?

This is not a problem for me as it would be for so many. My 85 year old mother isn't likely to find out and my my wife, my son, daughter all know (along with my close friends and even a few not so close). There are so many ways he could have learned that I can only suggest that he may have a small scale "intelligence operation" going on as powerful people often do have. The real questions may be : Will this have any effect on how I feel when I'm around this man? Will it inhibit my work? And of course : Does he really know anything or is he just fishing after getting a vague hint? If you feel secure enough just go ahead and talk to him. You express yourself well. Also if you're enough of an asset to the firm he won't want to upset that relationship. Chin up! (or drink up if that works better) --FLO--

Yoli, I know it a bit late, but a good rule of thumb is never party, go out with, etc someone you work with, especially your boss. Nothing but bad can come from it.

River

I wouldn't worry about it. It's really none of his business. It sounds to me as if HE sexually harassed you, though. Exposing himself like that within miles of a woman! Scandalous. You've been traumatized. You should sue.

Or take him duck hunting.

Paolo wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2006 8:23 pm I wouldn't worry about it. It's really none of his business. It sounds to me as if HE sexually harassed you, though. Exposing himself like that within miles of a woman! Scandalous. You've been traumatized. You should sue.

Or take him duck hunting.

But what if he is not a lawyer?

Yoli,

I'm ashamed of you. You work for a law firm. You were at a party where everyone was drinking. Your boss exposed himself to you and your first thought is not that you could OWN the company (or, at least, your boss).

Relax. I doubt that your boss will "remember" the incident in the morning. Once he thinks through the situation, he'd be too afraid of what you might do.

And, of course, what you do is perfectly legal. What he did....

... is NOT!

Yoli, sleepless in San Antonio.

(Well, I am an early riser anyway, so long as I'm not in Drunkytown.)

I need to assure all that the man did NOT deliberately expose himself to me or anyone else. I was the one who stumbled on him when he was taking a quick dip in the creek on the ranch. Further, I was the one who lurked, after pretending to leave, to get another eyeful. He in no way acted in an improper manner, either at the ranch or at the party the other night, at least in my view. He is a great man and we all respect and adore him. (And I'd like another peek, LOL!)

No, I have not EVER used the office 'puters for anything other than legal work and the occasional search for more goodies to spend $ on (See: Shoes, Blouses, Purses, etc.) so that can't be it.

Who let the balls...uhhh...cats...out of the bag? If I had to guess, it was one of the other women in the office, though I can't imagine which of the two that I may have jokingly mentioned castration to. One of them has shown an interest, dropping little references here and there, but never IN the office. Besides, we are all close and if one of them did let something slip it wasn't in a malicious way...NO way!

When I sit down for a chitchat with him, I'll turn the tables and ask HIM how he came to inquire re the subject. I then will answer ANY questions he has, truthfully and candidly, so long as no one else, such as Barry or any staff, is discussed. Besides, as the man pointed out...my private life is my own.

It's important that you know something about our "crew". We are a team AND we are friends, with due respect given to rank and position. There is NO backbiting and no one seeks to undermine others. It took years, according to the oldest person in the firm, to achieve this and no one there will intentionally screw it up.

Sexual harassment? There was one incident, a little over three years ago. We had hired a female, a member of a "minority" race (not in Dee-troit, though, LOL!) and did so based solely on qualifications. From the start, however, it was apparent that she had "attitude" and morale began to suffer as a consequence. If she wanted call in "sick", be late, take long lunches, well, she seemed to think she could do so without fear.

Once, when I desperately needed some files she was supposed to have on my desk by a certain time, I searched high and low only to find that she'd taken the day off on short notice and taken the files home with her. NOTE: I am the ONLY one permitted to take files in physical form or work from home. I earned it.

Anyway, when I confronted her she blithely stated that we would be wise to forget firing or disciplining her 'cause of her race...wrong!!! Then she said "Honey, you can get away with stuff too because you're a Mexican." What?!?! I informed her that A: I loved my work and those with whom I worked and would never expect anyone else to take up MY slack and B: That I was conceived, born, and spent my early childhood in SPAIN!

Well, anyway, a short time and many eff-ups later, she realized she was about to be canned. So, she decided she'd concoct a sexual harassment story so she could sue when fired, in case the race card didn't work.

Short version: She WAS terminated, DID sue and allege both sexual harassment AND racial BS. We countered with detailed data of her screw-ups and laxness, as well as proving that the partner whom she selected at random to accuse was, in fact, in San Diego for a week preceding the alleged incident and for 12 days thereafter. Result: You can guess. She and her "Al Sharpton wanna-be" lawyer were scorched by the presiding judge and left with their tails tucked! I laughed right in their sorry faces as they stalked out of the courthouse.

So, who knows what will come of all this? Nothing bad, to be sure.

Confession: Since the chat the other night, I've had this lil' fantasy wherein I meet with my boss and, once the doors are closed behind me, he asks if I'll inspect his goodies and tell him if I'd like to have his ballsies! Dream on, Yolanda! (Well, it COULD happen! LOL!) Fat chance.

Love to all, will report further developments. (Don't expect anything racy.)

Yoli The Good Girl

(Riiiiight!)

FianceeUvBigGuy (imported) wrote: Sun Dec 31, 2006 5:52 am Yoli, sleepless in San Antonio.

(Well, I am an early riser anyway, so long as I'm not in Drunkytown.)

I need to assure all that the man did NOT deliberately expose himself to me or anyone else. I was the one who stumbled on him when he was taking a quick dip in the creek on the ranch. Further, I was the one who lurked, after pretending to leave, to get another eyeful. He in no way acted in an improper manner, either at the ranch or at the party the other night, at least in my view. He is a great man and we all respect and adore him. (And I'd like another peek, LOL!)

No, I have not EVER used the office 'puters for anything other than legal work and the occasional search for more goodies to spend $ on (See: Shoes, Blouses, Purses, etc.) so that can't be it.

Who let the balls...uhhh...cats...out of the bag? If I had to guess, it was one of the other women in the office, though I can't imagine which of the two that I may have jokingly mentioned castration to. One of them has shown an interest, dropping little references here and there, but never IN the office. Besides, we are all close and if one of them did let something slip it wasn't in a malicious way...NO way!

When I sit down for a chitchat with him, I'll turn the tables and ask HIM how he came to inquire re the subject. I then will answer ANY questions he has, truthfully and candidly, so long as no one else, such as Barry or any staff, is discussed. Besides, as the man pointed out...my private life is my own.

It's important that you know something about our "crew". We are a team AND we are friends, with due respect given to rank and position. There is NO backbiting and no one seeks to undermine others. It took years, according to the oldest person in the firm, to achieve this and no one there will intentionally screw it up.

Sexual harassment? There was one incident, a little over three years ago. We had hired a female, a member of a "minority" race (not in Dee-troit, though, LOL!) and did so based solely on qualifications. From the start, however, it was apparent that she had "attitude" and morale began to suffer as a consequence. If she wanted call in "sick", be late, take long lunches, well, she seemed to think she could do so without fear.

Once, when I desperately needed some files she was supposed to have on my desk by a certain time, I searched high and low only to find that she'd taken the day off on short notice and taken the files home with her. NOTE: I am the ONLY one permitted to take files in physical form or work from home. I earned it.

Anyway, when I confronted her she blithely stated that we would be wise to forget firing or disciplining her 'cause of her race...wrong!!! Then she said "Honey, you can get away with stuff too because you're a Mexican." What?!?! I informed her that A: I loved my work and those with whom I worked and would never expect anyone else to take up MY slack and B: That I was conceived, born, and spent my early childhood in SPAIN!

Well, anyway, a short time and many eff-ups later, she realized she was about to be canned. So, she decided she'd concoct a sexual harassment story so she could sue when fired, in case the race card didn't work.

Short version: She WAS terminated, DID sue and allege both sexual harassment AND racial BS. We countered with detailed data of her screw-ups and laxness, as well as proving that the partner whom she selected at random to accuse was, in fact, in San Diego for a week preceding the alleged incident and for 12 days thereafter. Result: You can guess. She and her "Al Sharpton wanna-be" lawyer were scorched by the presiding judge and left with their tails tucked! I laughed right in their sorry faces as they stalked out of the courthouse.

So, who knows what will come of all this? Nothing bad, to be sure.

Confession: Since the chat the other night, I've had this lil' fantasy wherein I meet with my boss and, once the doors are closed behind me, he asks if I'll inspect his goodies and tell him if I'd like to have his ballsies! Dream on, Yolanda! (Well, it COULD happen! LOL!) Fat chance.

Love to all, will report further developments. (Don't expect anything racy.)

Yoli The Good Girl

(Riiiiight!)

YOLI!

OH HELL!

INVITE HIM TO JOIN THE E-A MESSAGE BOARDS. WE COULD USE SOME LEGAL ADVICE, AND I BELIEVE THAT HE'D HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME HERE.

I ALWAYS HAVE...

TELL HIM TO DO IT ANONYMOUSLY, AND TO ONLY TELL WHAT HE WANTED US TO KNOW ABOUT HIM.

AT ANY RATE, THAT WOULD QUELL HIS CURIOSITY, AND HE COULD BECOME INFORMED AND NOT HAVE TO BOTHER YOU FOR ANSWERS...

IT WOULD BE NICE FOR HIM TO FIND OUT HOW THIS SITE REALLY IS.

HELL, HE COULD BE HERE NOW AND NOBODY WOULD KNOW...