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Becoming a Republican

Posted: Wed Sep 06, 2006 3:34 pm
by JesusA (imported)
An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.

One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table three objects: a Bible, a silver dollar, and a bottle of whisky.

"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself, "and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which object he picks up. If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be! If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too. But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be."

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. He tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.

Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink.

"Lord have mercy," the old man whispered, "he's gonna be a Republican!"

Re: Becoming a Republican

Posted: Wed Sep 06, 2006 3:51 pm
by A-1 (imported)
Hmmm,

The most painful thing about "becoming" a Democrat was having the right half of my brain sucked out through my nose with a pipette...

😄

:D

;)

🚬 A-1 🚬

Re: Becoming a Republican

Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 2:38 am
by kb57z (imported)
I'm disappointed. With this thread's title, I was expecting some of the special effects from "An American Werewolf in London".

Re: Becoming a Republican

Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:38 am
by Patient (imported)
. . ., "he's gonna be a Republican!"This is one of those delightfully versatile stories that can be told on almost anyone. The first time I heard it the last word was "Congressman". I'm waiting for someone to make it "Baptist" or "Mormon" or "Episcopalian" so that thousands who are so disposed can find offense in it.

.

Re: Becoming a Republican

Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:58 am
by Slammr (imported)
Hmmm,
A-1 (imported) wrote: Wed Sep 06, 2006 3:51 pm The most painful thing about "becoming" a Democrat was having the right half of my brain sucked out through my nose with a pipette...

😄

:D

;)

🚬 A-1 🚬

That explains it! I always said you only had half a brain.

Just kidding, A-1. I love ya. I couldn't resist the opening you left me.

Re: Becoming a Republican

Posted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 7:00 pm
by A-1 (imported)
Slammr (imported) wrote: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:58 am That explains it! I always said you only had half a brain.

Just kidding, A-1. I love ya. I couldn't resist the opening you left me.

O.K., Slammr,

Just stay the hell away from the left nostril...

😄

🚬 A-1