Tide Detergent

Dear Tide Detergent Company,

I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it all

through my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best. Now

that I'm in my 50s, I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I

spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate & uncaring

husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was, & generally started being a

pain in the neck.

One thing led to another & somehow I ended up with a lot of his blood on

my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent,

but it just wouldn't come out. After a quick trip to the supermarket, I

purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, & to my surprise &

satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains came out

so well that the detective who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests

on my blouse was negative!

Then my attorney called & said that I would no longer be considered a

suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief! Going through

menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you,

once again, for having such a great product.

Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people,

another wonderful product!