A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the

wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to

tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring.

"Yeah,

right," she says. A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins

snoring as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep.

Muttering

to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and

ties

it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops

snoring. The woman is amazed!

Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with

his

buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring loudly.

The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So she goes to the

closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and carefully ties it around

her

husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps

soundly.

The next morning, the husband wakes up hung over. He stumbles into the

bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the

mirror

and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused,

and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees a red ribbon attached

to

his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and says,

"Boy, I don't remember where we were or what we did; but, by God, we

got

first and second place."