How Would You React?
Posted: Fri Apr 22, 2005 6:12 pm
You are one of three people on a malfunctioning airplane with only one
parachute. How would you react?
Pessimist: you refuse the parachute because you might die on the jump
anyway.
Optimist: you refuse the parachute because people have survived
crashes just like this before.
Procrastinator: you play a game of Monopoly for the parachute.
Bureaucrat: you order them to conduct a feasibility study on parachute
use in multi-engine aircraft under code red conditions.
Computer Scientist: you design a machine capable of operating a
parachute as well as a human being could.
Mathematician: you refuse to accept the parachute without proof that
it will work in all cases.
Engineer: you make them another parachute out of aisle curtains and
dental floss.
Psychoanalyst: you ask them what the shape of a parachute reminds them
of.
Doctor: you tell them you need to run more tests, then take the
parachute in order to make your next appointment.
Lawyer: you charge one parachute for helping them sue the airline.
Judge: after reminding them of their constitutional right to have a
parachute, you take it and jump out.
Economist: your only rational and moral choice is to take the
parachute, as the free market will take care of the other person.
Statistician: you plot a demand curve by asking them, at regular
intervals, how much they would pay for a parachute.
IRS auditor: you confiscate the parachute along with their luggage,
wallet, and gold fillings.
Manager: as you jump out with the parachute, you tell them to work
hard and not expect handouts.
Consultant: you tell them not to worry, since it won't take you long
to learn how to fix a plane.
Salesperson: you sell them the parachute at top retail rates and get
the names of their friends and relatives who might like one too.
Advertiser: you strip-tease while singing that what they need is a
neon parachute with computer altimeter for only $39.99.
Philosopher: you ask how they know the parachute actually exists.
Teacher: you give them the parachute and ask them to send you a report
on how well it worked.
English major: you explicate simile and metaphor in the parachute
instructions.
Comparative Literature major: you read the parachute instructions in
all four languages.
Dramatist: you tie them down so they can watch you develop the
character of a person stuck on a falling plane without a parachute.
Modern Painter: you hang the parachute on the wall and sign it.
Auto Mechanic: as long as you are looking at the plane engine, it
works fine.
parachute. How would you react?
Pessimist: you refuse the parachute because you might die on the jump
anyway.
Optimist: you refuse the parachute because people have survived
crashes just like this before.
Procrastinator: you play a game of Monopoly for the parachute.
Bureaucrat: you order them to conduct a feasibility study on parachute
use in multi-engine aircraft under code red conditions.
Computer Scientist: you design a machine capable of operating a
parachute as well as a human being could.
Mathematician: you refuse to accept the parachute without proof that
it will work in all cases.
Engineer: you make them another parachute out of aisle curtains and
dental floss.
Psychoanalyst: you ask them what the shape of a parachute reminds them
of.
Doctor: you tell them you need to run more tests, then take the
parachute in order to make your next appointment.
Lawyer: you charge one parachute for helping them sue the airline.
Judge: after reminding them of their constitutional right to have a
parachute, you take it and jump out.
Economist: your only rational and moral choice is to take the
parachute, as the free market will take care of the other person.
Statistician: you plot a demand curve by asking them, at regular
intervals, how much they would pay for a parachute.
IRS auditor: you confiscate the parachute along with their luggage,
wallet, and gold fillings.
Manager: as you jump out with the parachute, you tell them to work
hard and not expect handouts.
Consultant: you tell them not to worry, since it won't take you long
to learn how to fix a plane.
Salesperson: you sell them the parachute at top retail rates and get
the names of their friends and relatives who might like one too.
Advertiser: you strip-tease while singing that what they need is a
neon parachute with computer altimeter for only $39.99.
Philosopher: you ask how they know the parachute actually exists.
Teacher: you give them the parachute and ask them to send you a report
on how well it worked.
English major: you explicate simile and metaphor in the parachute
instructions.
Comparative Literature major: you read the parachute instructions in
all four languages.
Dramatist: you tie them down so they can watch you develop the
character of a person stuck on a falling plane without a parachute.
Modern Painter: you hang the parachute on the wall and sign it.
Auto Mechanic: as long as you are looking at the plane engine, it
works fine.