There were three legionnaires walking through the desert under a baking

sun. They were fully equipped with enough water for days, and food

aplenty.

On the shimmering horizon mirages came and went and came again, visions of

swimming pools attended by dusky maidens, stalls full of ice-cream,

sorbets, freshly-whipped smoothies of every conceivable flavour. But no

avail, the legionnaires did not crack, but kept marching solidly on.

Suddenly one of them froze, "Psssst" said he. His companions halted, and

strained their eyes to where the first legionnaire was pointing. "Le

voila", said he, "Regardez, mes amis, isn't that a bacon tree on the

horizon"?

And sure enough, there it stood, proudly and defiant in the middle of the

desert, a true bacon tree. Slowly they crept forward towards the mystery

object afar off. Inch by inch,centimetre by centimetre, until they were

within a stone's throw of the bacon tree. Even nearer they crept, and

suddenly, a shot rang out, dropping one of the legionnaires in his tracks.

The other two returned fire, and gave first aid to their wounded

companion.

Even as they bandaged him, and poured water over his face, they could hear

his faint voice "That was no bacon tree," he gasped, "that was an am bush.