A good 'ol boy had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of his pickup truck and one behind it.

Then just stood back and waited. A passerby from the city studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back.

He asked the fellow what the problem was.

The fellow replied, "Flat tire."

In response the passerby asked, "But, what's with the flowers?"

(DO you want to see the REST? Be careful, but remember what you have asked for, now....)

The man responded, "When ya' break down they tell ya' to put flares in the front and flares in the back.........I ain't never understood it neither.



A-1

A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright,"T-G-I-F."

He smiled at her and replied,"S-H-I-T."

She looked puzzled, and repeated,"T-G-I-F," more slowly.

He again answered,"S-H-I-T."

The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so, she smiled her biggest smile and said as sweetly as possibly, "T-G-I-F."

The man smiled back to her and once again, "S-H-I-T."

The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain,"'T-G-I-F' means 'Thank Goodness It's Friday.' Get it, duuhhh?"





































The man answered, "'S-H-I-T' means Sorry, Honey, It's Tuesday."

Hail to thee, oh Robbie.

I shall writist thou name in in the upcoming election of the King.



A-1

Aw shucks A-1, you shouldn't...

On second thought, Nov. 2nd is just around the corner...

WHAT CORNER, MR. HOOVER?



Pals Y'all needed a hug...





A-1

One find day a man took a drive down a country road with his kids. Things went fine until the man felt a "thump." He knew he had run over something.

Not wanting his kids to see, in case he had killed an animal, he told them to stay in the car.

He gets out of his car and walked to the back of the car to discover the corpse of a lifeless bunny. He was heartbroken. Somehow, he had to dispose of the body without letting his kids see the poor crushed bunny. As he was thinking, an old man walks up and says he can solve the problem.

The old man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a blue vial. He pours the contents into the bunny's mouth.

A few minutes later, the bunny springs to its feet full of vim and vigor, runs ten feet away then turns and waves. The bunny then ran several more feet and turned and waves. The bunny did this till he was out of sight.

The driver looks in amazement and asks, "what was in that blue vial"?

The old man answers, "hare restorer with permament wave."

Oh, MACKIE,

I must ASK.

Did the HARE turn BLUE and did it lay on some old lady's head?

Was it the same old lasy who chased the preacher from the pulpit and then finally caught him by the ORGAN?

OH, MACKIE, tell me, true...









A-1

A chief petty officer caught an AWOL sailor as he tried to sneak aboard

ship. Upon hearing the sailor's lame explanation, the petty officer told

him, "Sweep every link on this anchor chain by morning, or it's the brig for

you!" The sailor picked up a broom, but before he could sweep, a tern landed

on the handle. The lad picked the tern off and tossed it overboard. The bird

lit again on the broom handle, and was again tossed away. On and on, through

the night, they went through the same routine. In the morning, when the

petty officer inspected, he found the chain still dirty. "What have you been

doing all night?" he asked angrily. "Honest, chief," came the reply, "I

tossed a tern all night and couldn't sweep a link!"