Q) What is perfect pitch on a viola?

A) twenty five feet with the lid up...

Q) In heaven you get a harp, in hell you get ???

A) an accordian

Q) How do you get a violist to play tremolo?

A) Mark the passage "solo"

Q) What's the difference between a rutabaga and a bagpipe?

A) you can eat the rutabaga

Q) If a bagpiper tells you he's been playing the intrument for 20 years, how many of them have been spent tuning up?

A) 10 or 12 and he's still out of tune!!

Did you know that at the USA Accordian convention they have a "Lady of Spain" hour.

Imagine all those accordians playing "Lady of Spain" at once -

Q : ...What is the difference between a Clarinet and a Bassoon?

A : ...A Bassoon burns longer with a hotter flame.

A-1