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Weird Nightmares
Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 7:14 pm
by Josh Goodman (imported)
Did you always know about castration even without being told? I did. In early childhood I discovered that little girls had no penises and no balls. It looked as if girls didn't have much of anything down there. I guess I thought they had been born with such parts but had them removed for some unknown reason.
At about the age of six or seven I had these really really super vivid nightmares about being castrated, and or having my penis removed. In these dreams I was one of many boys being cut but the reason for it was never made clear. It was not to prevent sex or mastrubation as, at the time, I didn't know what those things were. In one such dream, still very fresh in my mind, all the boys in my first grade class were nullified in a painless but none the less humiliating procedure. When I was a little older, about nine or ten, I dreamed a white van would come around to collect boys for castration. They got my best friend first and then a few weeks later they got me.
These nightmares scared me silly. I had no idea where they were coming from, what they meant, or why I was having them. But at the same time they were sexually quite stimulating. In other words they turned me on long before I knew what being turned on was all about. I hated the nightmares because they were so troubling, but at the same time I loved them for the feelings of sexual excitement they gave me.
At about the age of ten or 12 I learned that in the past boys really had been castrated to make castrati singers, or eunuchs, or slaves. It was the weirdest thing because I had the feeling that this knowledge had somehow always been with me. No one had ever told me about castration but I just sort of knew all abou it. I also felt that I knew exactly how those boys felt when they were castrated because I felt as if it had happened to me. It was like I had been one such unlucky kid in a past life.
Is it just me or have others had the same weird nightmares?
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 7:54 pm
by evenealy (imported)
Josh Goodman (imported) wrote: Sun May 01, 2011 7:14 pm
Did you always know about castration even without being told? I did. In early childhood I discovered that little girls had no penises and no balls. It looked as if girls didn't have much of anything down there. I guess I thought they had been born with such parts but had them removed for some unknown reason.
At about the age of six or seven I had these really really super vivid nightmares about being castrated, and or having my penis removed. In these dreams I was one of many boys being cut but the reason for it was never made clear. It was not to prevent sex or mastrubation as, at the time, I didn't know what those things were. In one such dream, still very fresh in my mind, all the boys in my first grade class were nullified in a painless but none the less humiliating procedure. When I was a little older, about nine or ten, I dreamed a white van would come around to collect boys for castration. They got my best friend first and then a few weeks later they got me.
These nightmares scared me silly. I had no idea where they were coming from, what they meant, or why I was having them. But at the same time they were sexually quite stimulating. In other words they turned me on long before I knew what being turned on was all about. I hated the nightmares because they were so troubling, but at the same time I loved them for the feelings of sexual excitement they gave me.
At about the age of ten or 12 I learned that in the past boys really had been castrated to make castrati singers, or eunuchs, or slaves. It was the weirdest thing because I had the feeling that this knowledge had somehow always been with me. No one had ever told me about castration but I just sort of knew all abou it. I also felt that I knew exactly how those boys felt when they were castrated because I felt as if it had happened to me. It was like I had been one such unlucky kid in a past life.
Is it just me or have others had the same weird nightmares?
I didnÂ’t even know I was a boy till I hit first grade so I didnÂ’t have fantasies or anything like that. But you should consider writing some of your dreams out on paper. I have done this and have some great material. Good Luck!
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 1:50 am
by Hash (imported)
Yes, I had nightmares very similar, although I can't remember most of them, I remember being attacked and having someone or something take hold of my penis & balls and pick me up by them. I remember running away, being caught, and having my balls were ripped off. That's still with me, it was scary stuff, as I remember, but as I entered puberty, it was sexually stimulating because I'd wake up with nocturnal emissions. Not sure what prompted these pre-teen dreams, but I had them a lot and most of the time woke up scared.
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 9:25 am
by the_blacklist (imported)
I had nightmares very similar to that around age 3 or 4. I thought it worked similar to the werewolf effect, where one person is nullified and turned into a woman, then that woman is now out to look for people to nullify. It took me a long time to trust women because I thought it was a conspiracy and only they knew of their diabolical plan. And on days when mom made hot dogs, it just freaked me out and probably pushed me over the edge.
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 9:53 am
by tugon (imported)
In one of my dreams I felt so strongly I was a girl that when I awoke I was truly shocked by my boy's body. I felt relieved that I had boys clothes in my closet.
I think this dream had more to do with a past life than with a true desire to be female.
My dreams of castration did not start until I was an adult and had decided it was what I wanted. In my dreams my scrotum was gone and I looked very smooth under my penis. In my real life I still have my scrotum.
Just recently in a dream I observed two men being surgically castrated. The dream was rather vague but I think the reason for their castration was as punishment. The person doing the cutting was very skilled. He may have been a doctor but again the dream was vague.
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:54 am
by chibifish (imported)
I've only ever had one dream I'd consider a real nightmare, and that was my first sleep paralysis dream... and it involved some terrifying bat-owl-thing hovering over me menacingly. Nothing to do with castration, though when I woke up that general region felt a little sore (at the time, my conclusion was that I had tried and failed to wet myself in terror.).
I did have one dream in which I wound up castrated, though it wasn't particularly emotionally involved. There was some sort of epic storyline that I don't quite remember, but at some point in the middle of it, I'm randomly captured by a pair of teachers who have mistaken me for some criminal that they intended to castrate as punishment. I was more concerned with whatever the main plot was, so just dealt with it and went on my way; it only really came up again later in that there was some slight pain where I'd been cut while I was making a dramatic rush down some stairs, and I hinted to the teachers later in the dream that they might have got the wrong person.
(This was when I was thirteen, I think. Shortly after I'd heard of vigilantes castrating a rapist only a few hundred miles from my general area. I'm pretty sure that's what sparked it.)
I did have one odd dream in which I was sitting on a couch in a hallway where a lot of my classmates were coming and going, somehow expecting not to be noticed while I sat there naked and with my genetils apparently capable of detaching on command. Mainly what I was trying to accomplish there was tearing off the big wedge of pubic hair, but that wasn't working so well. Eventually I had to pee, so put them back on and ran into the bathroom. Then I woke up, first knocternal emition. :-/
There wasn't any sexual feeling involved in that one, really. But when I compare that to the second KE ... Hmm. Meditate on this, I must.
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 11:03 pm
by Cainanite (imported)
I remember being about four or five, and asking my mother why boys had balls. I remember saying I wished they could be cut off, because they were not good for anything. My mother just smiled and told me I'd think differently when I was older. She must have been shocked at what I said.
I remember dreaming that I'd wake up with them missing. I don't remember being scared by those dreams, but pleased. I don't ever remember a dream where my penis was cut off, but I always fantasized about losing my balls. I remember those dreams as pleasurable.
It wasn't until I was about fifteen or sixteen, and just starting puberty that I learned about eunuchs. I think the first one I read about was in the Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer. A eunuch was being mocked and humiliated as he tried to sell fake religious relics. I remember being very aroused by the thought of him.
Until then, I thought such crazy things were only in my imagination. Prior to that, I often dreamed about having no balls. I always felt free, like I was flying. I cannot remember any castration dreams. I would just become aware during the dream, that my testicles and scrotum were gone.
By what magic my balls would disappear was unclear. There was no distress at the thought. Perhaps there were some humiliation dreams where I appeared naked in class, sans testicles, but nothing on the level of violent nightmares.
I can only imagine how horrible it must have been to have nightmares like those. Dreams can be very impactful on our real lives. They can stay with you for a long time, and influence us even longer.
Re: Weird Nightmares
Posted: Sat May 14, 2011 1:03 pm
by curious19 (imported)
I had such a nightmare at 14. I remember it started to become a sort of fantasy about being abused and cut in time.
