Nice gift
Posted: Fri Jun 05, 2009 4:06 pm
On my 68th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my "significant other". The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living in the Everglades at a nearby Seminole reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.
After being persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my certificate to the medicine man and wondered what would happen next.
The old man slowly, methodically produced a potion, handed it to me, and with a grip on my shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3'.. When you do that, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."
I was encouraged.. As I walked away, I turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,' he responded. "But when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon.."
I was very eager to see if it worked so I went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my "woman" to join me in the bedroom.
When she came in, I took off my clothes and said, "1-2-3!"
Immediately, I was the manliest of men. She was excited and began throwing off her clothes. Just before she joined me in bed, she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And THAT, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition!
ONE COULD END UP WITH A DANGLING PARTICIPLE!!!
After being persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my certificate to the medicine man and wondered what would happen next.
The old man slowly, methodically produced a potion, handed it to me, and with a grip on my shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3'.. When you do that, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."
I was encouraged.. As I walked away, I turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,' he responded. "But when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon.."
I was very eager to see if it worked so I went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my "woman" to join me in the bedroom.
When she came in, I took off my clothes and said, "1-2-3!"
Immediately, I was the manliest of men. She was excited and began throwing off her clothes. Just before she joined me in bed, she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And THAT, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition!
ONE COULD END UP WITH A DANGLING PARTICIPLE!!!