Pithy Quotations
Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 10:10 pm
Having been inspired by Jesus' posts on Earinus the Eunuch, I was searching for a a Martial epigram I learned in my high school Latin class. I didn't find it but I ran across a collection of witty quotes. What I include here is a fraction of the list at Rand Lindsly's HUGE Quotations File (http://www.ashep.com/archive/loQtus/rand.html).
"Parades should be classed as a nuisance and participants
should be subject to a term in prison."
-Will (I never met a man I didn't like) Rogers
When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.
Victor Borge
If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing.
-Kingsley Amis
Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.
-Nicholas Murray Butler
All this fuss about sleeping together. For physical pleasure
I'd sooner go to my dentist any day.
Evelyn Waugh (1903-1966)
The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.
John Barrymore (1882-1942)
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
Albert Schweitzer
Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
Al Capp
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.
James Thurber (1894-1961)
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)
California is the only state in the union where you can
fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
William Claude Dunkenfield ("W. C. Fields")(1880-1946)
I once said cynically of a politician, "He'll doublecross that bridge when he comes to it"
Oscar Levant (1906-1972)
I'm not OK, you're not OK, and that's OK.
William Sloane Coffin
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)
Dinner theater is anti-culture.
John Simon
Virtue has never been as respectable as money.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
Living in California adds ten years to a man's life. And
those extra ten years I'd like to spent in New York.
Harry Ruby
"Parades should be classed as a nuisance and participants
should be subject to a term in prison."
-Will (I never met a man I didn't like) Rogers
When an opera star sings her head off, she usually improves her appearance.
Victor Borge
If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing.
-Kingsley Amis
Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.
-Nicholas Murray Butler
All this fuss about sleeping together. For physical pleasure
I'd sooner go to my dentist any day.
Evelyn Waugh (1903-1966)
The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run.
John Barrymore (1882-1942)
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
Albert Schweitzer
Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
Al Capp
She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.
James Thurber (1894-1961)
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
H.L. Mencken (1880-1956)
California is the only state in the union where you can
fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
William Claude Dunkenfield ("W. C. Fields")(1880-1946)
I once said cynically of a politician, "He'll doublecross that bridge when he comes to it"
Oscar Levant (1906-1972)
I'm not OK, you're not OK, and that's OK.
William Sloane Coffin
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)
Dinner theater is anti-culture.
John Simon
Virtue has never been as respectable as money.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
Living in California adds ten years to a man's life. And
those extra ten years I'd like to spent in New York.
Harry Ruby