Rectum stretcher

[A-1 (imported)]

While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my

way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ' he asked.

'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'

Traffic Ticket - $95.00

Court Costs - $45.00

Look on the Cop's Face................PRICELESS

[Dave (imported)]

Funny, funny...

I knew a fellow who publically "mother-f$$cked" a policman and walked away. About a year later, when the policeman caught him drag racing in a parking lot, he lost his license to drive for at least ten years thanks to the one word "MF" and the large number of points assigned to his license on the many tickets he received...

Cute joke. Two thumbs up.

[gandalf (imported)]

Cute story. One thing I did notice was whatever court jurisdiction that was in was very lenient on costs. When I read that type of report in the police records or court records, the court costs usually run twice what the ticket costs. Idon't plan on getting any just to make sure.

Gandalf