Riverwind (imported) wrote: Wed May 18, 2005 7:22 am I think you all need to go to your rooms.

I had this uncle, he is gone now but back in the 30s and 40s he was a major league pitcher. Was the world series when in St Louis, 1946 which was a very good year. Anyway life after baseball, my uncle told jokes and stories. We spent the evening with him and the next day, he told one joke after another and not once did he tell an off colored joke, ethnic joke, or a joke agenst ones nationally. All his stuff was funny, all could be told in church.

Thank you "Red" where ever you are.

Robby (imported) wrote: Tue May 17, 2005 6:17 pm You know, this joke is quite derogatory toward Asians... Not sure if I should remove it. But on second thought, it was a White Man who suggested his wife as a cure... so I will leave it alone.

Slammr (imported) wrote: Wed May 18, 2005 12:11 pm This was originally an ethnic joke, but I'll change it around some and make it a Texas joke for studlover:

Larry Andersen, late of Boston, Massachusetts, had been transferred by his company to San Antonio, Texas. He shared a cubicle with Joe Studlover, a native of San Antonio. Joe noticed that every morning, when Larry came in, he would run his middle finger past his nose, inhaling as he did. Then, when he exhaled, he said, "Ahh... Marianne."

Finally, Joe could contain his curiosity no longer. "Why do you smell your finger," he said, "then say, 'Ahh...Marianne?"

Larry answered," After I make love to my wife at night, I stick my finger in her snatch and leave it there until the next morning. That way, when I come to work the next day, all I have to do to remember the good time I had the night before is to smell my finger."

Now, Joe thought that was pretty good idea. The next day at work, after Larry had smelled his finger, Joe stuck his nose to his elbow, then -- with one long inhalation -- he smelled his whole arm clear to the tip of his middle finger. "Ahh..." he said, "Lucille."

Astonished, Larry stared at him. He almost had to pick his chin up off the floor. "Is Lucille your wife?" Larry asked.

"Hell no," said Joe Studlover, "I ain't married. Lucille's mah horse."

Studlover (imported) wrote: Wed May 18, 2005 6:18 pm Slammr,

THAT'S HILARIOUS!!! I love it!

Hoboy, is that going to open up the Texas Cowboy/Sheep jokes?

Studlover

Studlover (imported) wrote: Wed May 18, 2005 6:18 pm Slammr,

THAT'S HILARIOUS!!! I love it!

Hoboy, is that going to open up the Texas Cowboy/Sheep jokes?

Studlover

Slammr (imported) wrote: Thu May 19, 2005 9:04 am Studlover: how about a chicken joke? It's old. I heard it about a hundred years ago.

The reporter writing this article was from Newsweek, so I can't vouch for its veracity.

A reporter from Newsweek was writing a feature article on the Texas cowboy. He was interviewing one such cowboy who spent his winters by himself in a line shack isolated from other people. After he had concluded his official interview, he had some other questions for the cowboy -- questions of a more personal nature.

"It must get pretty lonesome out here all by yourself." The reporter looked around. The cowboy had a dog to keep him company, he had his horse, some cows grazed nearby, and some chickens pecked at whatever they could find in the sparse vegetation.

"Yes, suh. It do get purty lonesome out heah."

The reporter looked away momentarily. He was a little bit embarrassed to ask the next question, but he just had to know. "I understand, since there aren't any women out here, that you cowboys will do it with anything that's available, horses," the reporter glanced at the cowboy's dog, noticing that it was female, then added, "dogs, cows, and...chickens."

An incredulous look of horror appeared on the cowboy's face. Indignant --standing up abruptly -- he said, "Chickens?"