Prepositional/Propositional Ending

[JesusA (imported)]

Harry is getting along in years and finds that he is unable to perform sexually. He finally goes to his doctor, who tries a few things but nothing seems to work. So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man.

The medicine man says, 'I can cure this.' That said, he throws a white powder into a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke.

Then he says, 'This is powerful medicine. You can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say '123' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!'

The guy then asks, 'What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?'

The medicine man replies: 'All you or your partner have to say is 1234, and it will go down. But be warned--it will not work again for another year!'

Harry rushes home, eager to try out his new powers and prowess. That night he is ready to surprise Janice. He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion.

He gets into bed, and lying next to her says, '123.' He suddenly becomes more aroused than anytime in his life ... just as the medicine man had promised.

Janice, who had been facing away, turns over and asks, 'What did you say 123 for?'

And that, my friends, is why you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition.

[Blaise (imported)]

Perfect cap to the day!

[Charis (imported)]

good one, well worth forwarding to friends.

[DeaconBlues (imported)]

Ok, seeing this joke about not ending a sentence with a preposition caused me to cogitate, and after some cogitation I was able to produce my new and improved (and BIGGER! well, longer anyway) joke on the importance of good grammar. You will not doubt notice that MY joke is MUCH BIGGER, and who says size is not important?

This is a story about the IMPORTANCE of good grammar.

"Bubba" was the epitome of the negative stereotype "red-neck." He was the product of a broken home, he had dropped out of school in the eighth grade, had no useful skills to get any sort of decent employment. By the time he was twenty he had already had a few "brushes with the law" and was fast on his way to being a career criminal.

It was no surprise to the County Prosecutor, when the sheriff arrested him for a string of armed robberies. The evidence was clear and irrefutable, a plea agreement was gratefully accepted by the public defender, but he could hardly do anything but plea for mercy at Bubba's sentencing, there was little mercy in the Judge's heart for this repeat offender. As the Judge handed down the sentence, TWENTY YEARS, he gave Bubba the most severe tongue lashing he could.... "No possibility of rehabilitation.... forever a menace and threat to society... no desire to improve your life through any honest means....." Somehow, maybe it was the naturally defiant nature of Bubba, but something struck a chord in his heart and he set his mind to proving them all wrong.

Bubba was sent off to the state's worst and most brutal maximum security prison, and there the story would have ended for anyone else, but Bubba had set his stubborn mind to changing himself, and he was NOT going to let anything keep him from doing what he had finally set his mind to do.

In perhaps the first stroke of good luck Bubba ever had, the state corrections board had just started a education program for prisoners, and the most unlikely person ever to work in a prison was hired to head that program at the prison Bubba was sent to. The Director of Prisoner Education and Development was a beautiful young woman, forever optimistic about even the worst and most incorrigible prisoners. The tough prison warden thought she would not last a day but she also was persistent and tenacious, like a bull dog when it came to realizing her goals.

She decided that Bubba was going to be her first success story the minute she read his file, and Bubba was a spectacular success. In preliminary I.Q. tests Bubba scored exceptionally high in spite of his lack of education. With her help, Bubba got his G.E.D. in no time, and was enrolled in a special college program for prisoners. Bubba worked increadibly hard and got his BS in english in only three years. He had become a model prisoner and even the hard nosed warden had to admit he had been very wrong about Bubba.

Bubba found he had a gift for writing, and soon pened a novel, a heart warming romance novel, which he sent to a publisher, and overnight it was a best seller. Translated into many other languages and sold all over the world. The royalties soon made Bubba the richest prisoner in the state. He did not spend a penny on himself though, he insisted on paying total restitution to all the victims of his criminal past, and even went further and paid large settlements to the ones he had traumatized in his robberies. When the warden got news of that, he called Bubba into his office and said that now he believed Bubba was at least ready to put in a request for parole, and that he would personally endorse Bubba's parole request. But Bubba flatly told the warden that he was not interested in parole yet, because he did not feel in his heart that he was truly changed enough.

Years passed, Bubba, with the help of the Education Director got in to a post graduate program and eventually got his Ph.D. He wrote more romance novels and every one became a best seller, and soon Bubba was very very wealthy, but still, he lived very frugally, saving a vast fortune.

But by now, "Doctor Bubba's" fame was making it very embarrasing for the state to keep him locked up, the Governor had been innundated with letters from Bubba's adoring fans. Pleas for Bubba's release, accusations of cruelty and barbarism for keeping such a talented and sensitive man locked up. The Governor ordered the warden to get stubborn Bubba in front of a parole board, but Bubba again would not seek parole. Finally, the Governor forced his hand, by writing a pardon, and the Governor personally went to the prison to deliver it to Bubba.

There, in the warden's office, Bubba said he might be ready to leave prison, but he would still be a prisoner if his heart was not freed, and for that he needed more than the Governor's pardon... He tearfully explained to the Governor and warden that he had fallen deeply in love with the only person who had shown him any encouragement, the Education Director, Bubba asked that she see the pardon, and told them that he had something VERY important to as her. Now, even the tough old warden was choked up, and told his secretary to bring the Education Director to his office immediately.

She soon was there, with the Governor and warden watching, Bubba got on his knees in front of her and said that he would forever be condemned if not for her, that she was the only person who could ever really free him. He told her that he would gladly give her all his fortune, if she would just give him her hand in marraige. She was now smiling and blinking back the tears of joy, so overwhelmed, then suddenly her face changed to a harsh frown! "NO!" she said.

The warden and Governor were shocked, stunned, at this display of harsh cruelty, and poor Bubba was devastated. Tearfully he asked her, "Why? Why?" he could say no more, he was now crying. But she could say more, and she did! "YOU! You, a Ph.D., and an accomplished author, yet you don't know that you should NEVER END A SENTENCE WITH A PROPOSITION!"

[Arab Nights (imported)]

But isn't it wonderful when a sentence ending with a proposition is followed by "Yes"?

[DeaconBlues (imported)]

But isn't it wonderful when a sentence ending with a proposition is followed by "Yes"?

OK, alright already! I know better than anyone that ALL really good love stories must have a happy ending... so:

"After Dr. Bubba agreed that it would have been yet another terrible mistake on his part, to end his prison sentence with a propostion, he apollogized and corrected himself.

First he gladly accepted the Govornor's pardon, and officially ENDED the first sentence. THEN, he proceded onward to committ the worst mistake of his life and asked for the Education Director's hand in marraige. Woe unto poor Bubba, she accepted, and they are married now, with children, "The full catastophy" as "Zorba the Greek" would have described it.... Yeah, they "all lived happily ever after."