More Dead Cat Jokes

[An Onymus (imported)]

There seem to be a lot of this type of joke going around, or maybe it's just because I spent a lot of time during a week off, in places where they were current.

Why was the cat found dead in an herb garden?

That's where he overdosed on catnip.

Why was swallowing a fishhook fatal to the dead cat?

Because he stuck his tongue too far up his anus.

Why did the dead cat get too close to a speeding used car?

He didn't realize it was a dog.

Why was it fatal to the dead cat, when someone shot at him, and the bullet grazed the base of his tail?

Because it hit him in the mouth.

When did the dead cat find out he was in a serious predicament?

When he realized he was surrounded by eleven dogs, and the nearest tree was a mile away.

Why was a lack of discrimination fatal to the dead cat?

He didn't realize that what he was licking, was a bulldog's rear end.

Why did the cat die of dehydration, when he went on a starvation diet?

He thought he had to spit every time he licked his hind end.

When did the dead cat know his worst fears would be realized?

When he looked down the trunk of a tree, and saw three dogs putting on climber's boots.

[Dave (imported)]

this seems to me to be an awfully "anal" line of thought.