gender therapists in the bay area?

[purpletomato (imported)]

Is anyone here from the bay area (preferably, east bay), and familiar with any gender therapists? Unfortunately, I don't seem to be able to coax any good results out of this site's search feature, so apologies if this is a duplicate thread. I know there are other websites, but I feel they are geared towards truer transsexuals, and would of course like anyone's experience.

I feel like I am somewhere between MtE and MtF; I've wanted to be castrated for a long time, and have (sans any doctor approval) been taking spironolactone for 5 years, at first to reduce testosterone, and now at "chemical castration" doses of 200-400 mg / day (I usually try to stick to 300). There is no question in my mind that I am gender dysphoric; I seem to be in generally good spirits on spironolactone (some here say they get depressed ... I have very little libido, but seem happy). With regard to gender identity, I sometimes feel more feminine, but am pretty covert about it, and have never cross-dressed, etc. I do feel very non-male though -- I'm not interested in sports, being strong, emotionally "stoic" (sorry to perpetuate the misuse of the word), etc., and more concretely do not like my genitals.

thanks very much!!

[JesusA (imported)]

Fortunately, there are a number of very fine gender specialists in the Bay Area. A first step would be to check the web site of Bay Area Gender Associates:

http://bayareagenderassociates.blogspot.com/

While I know and respect all of the members of the group whom I have met (and I’m scheduled to speak on the counseling of Male-to-Eunuch individuals at their December meeting), I would recommend that you contact Rebecca Auge first. Her office is near the boundary between Berkeley and Oakland and she is probably the nearest to you. You can read her blog site, “Gender and Life’s Paths” at:

http://rebeccaaugephd.blogspot.com/

Rebecca studied to be an astronomer (and was a very good one) before transitioning and moving to psychology. She is an absolute delight to be around.

Randall Ehrbar, who formerly practiced in San Francisco (he’s now on the faculty at Colorado) presented a case study of an MtE transition that he facilitated in the panel that I put together for the WPATH meeting in Atlanta. He has spoken to the Bay Area group about that experience and several of them were in the audience in Atlanta when both he and I spoke.

Best wished for your journey.

[loveableleopardy (imported)]

Sounds like that info will be very helpful to purpletomato Jesus.

If only you knew of this sort of help in the east bay area of Australia

PT - let us know how you go with Rebecca or anyone else that you seek assistance from.

[purpletomato (imported)]

of course; might be some time since I'm a student and pretty busy. thanks very much, Jesus.

[purpletomato (imported)]

I met with Dr. Auge yday. She was a very neat person; definitely able to see eye-to-eye with my tech passions (and love of pets, music). I felt pretty comfortable conversing with her. She was okay with my taking spironolactone, and with whatever my gender identity settles on (right now, it feels like nothing / agendered, but I've been flawlessly covert for so long, probably 12 years). I did get the slightest feeling that she gravitated towards avoiding permanent changes if possible ... which is okay (though I'm pretty sure I want them), I'll just have to see how it plays out.

Anyway, I was feeling pretty stressed today though. I feel like being super secretive kept me safe for a long time -- somewhere between 10-12 years, and now (a) I'm more in touch with being not completely sure who I am (b) I need to choose who to trust and when. Things like cross-dressing require interacting with people and seem kinda foreboding at the time. (I am excited to meet some trans. people, which coincidentally I never have.) My old friends and current colleagues only have subtle, implicit hints of my gender variance (smooth face, ponytail, never having / talking about relationships), and they probably don't notice it. It feels like the self-security part of my brain has broken down; I wish I had a friend to give me a hug .

[Caith721 (imported)]

Wishing I were close enough. I'd gladly provide you that hug.

Stay strong, you're making positive constructive steps.