Epitaphs

[JesusA (imported)]

A truly Happy Person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.... And one who can enjoy browsing fascinating thoughts on old tombstones in old cemeteries...

Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York:

Born 1903--Died 1942.

Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the

car was on the way down.

It was.

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In a Thurmont, Maryland , cemetery:

Here lies an Atheist,

all dressed up

and no place to go.

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On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in

East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:

Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102.

Only The Good Die Young.

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In a London , England cemetery:

Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid

but died an old Mann.

Dec. 8, 1767

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In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:

Anna Wallace

The children of Israel wanted bread,

And the Lord sent them manna.

Clark Wallace wanted a wife,

And the Devil sent him Anna.

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In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:

Here lies Johnny Yeast....

Pardon him for not rising.

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In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.

Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.

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In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:

Here lays The Kid.

We planted him raw.

He was quick on the trigger

But slow on the draw.

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A lawyer's epitaph in England:

Sir John Strange.

Here lies an honest lawyer,

and that is Strange..

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John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne,

England, cemetery:

Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,

Dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.

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In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England :

On the 22nd of June,

Jonathan Fiddle went out of tune.

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Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls,

Vermont:

Here lies the body of our Anna,

Done to death by a banana.

It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,

But the skin of the thing that made her go.

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On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket,

Massachusetts:

Under the sod and under the trees,

Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.

He is not here, there's only the pod.

Pease shelled out and went to God.

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In a cemetery in England:

Remember man, as you walk by,

As you are now, so once was I.

As I am now, so shall you be.

Remember this and follow me.

To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:

To follow you I'll not consent.

Until I know which way you went.

[Arab Nights (imported)]

From memory:

Here lies Lester Moore

Four slugs from a .44

No less

No more

Here lies George Peas

Peas ain't here

Only his pod

Peas shelled out

And went home to God

I have reserved:

Show me a man with both feet

Firmly planted on solid earth

And I will show you a man

Who cannot get his pants off.

Of course, to be really philosophical takes more space than your typical headstone allows:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVf4yLclMfI

[Riverwind (imported)]

thanks for the video,

When your are out walking,

and you smell it up ahead,

that's just a little warning,

nothing much to dread,

just walk around it,

and tip your hat instead.

River