I posted on here a few of months ago that I was going to start chemically castrating myself. At the time things were going well for me and life was good.

However, about a month after I started I became seriously depressed and found it hard tto keep my life running. I then made a suicide attempt that landed me in the local psychiatric ward. This was a bloody awful experience. I was in for a week but managed to talk my way out after that.

Unwisely, I thought that the anti-depressants I had been given would be enough to help me deal with the depression caused by lack of testosterone. A month later I was on holiday in France and feeling so depressed and suicidal that I had to come home early (this was last Wednesday) and now I am in the psychiatric ward again. At least this time I didn't try to kill myself, but coming home from holiday early was very expensive and incredibly disappointing.

I can only attribute my depression to a lack of testoserone caused by the chemical castration, nothing else in my life had gone wrong to cause me to be depressed. Obviously, being very depressed, and being locked up because of it, has had a serious impact on my life. I am going to stop the medication this time and hope I cheer up as it works its way out of my system.

If you are considering castration do bear in mind that serious depression is a risk you run. I didn't think it would happen to me as my life was running so well and I was generally a happy chap, but it did happen, and it hit me hard. Hard enough for me to try and kill myself. It really is something you should consider beforre you embark on such a project.

Obviously I am still extremely depressed, I am writing this on my pocket computer from the psychiatric ward, but also I am unhappy that it now seems I am stuck with testosterone for the rest of my life; I cannot deal with this level of depression again.

Please do consider the risks of serious depression before you try chemical castration.

Anon,

TPinot.

can you please tell us the drugs & dosage you used? It sounds like you had a rapid drop and your body didn't have time to adjust. Please let us know so others wont make the mistake of what ever drug protocol you used.

I'm glad your getting taken care of. DO tell them about your hormone issues / chemical castration. They should be able to help you more directly if they know what the core issue is.

I think we should respect that this didn't work for him and not try to talk him into adjusting doses or further fiddling around when it clearly nearly killed him. From my own experience low testosterone can be gotten "used" to but in my case I was a complete ass and pretty miserable. Maybe there is a true "eunuch calm?" I don't know.

I know a lot of folks will be put off by my statement that self medication is not a good idea. But here is why - Liver damage that can go on un-known to the patient alone is reason to seek medical advice before doing any fiddling with these types of meds.

I'm not intending to talk him into anything, i just would like to know the protocol he used, this will help build the general knowledge base and prevent it in the future. if he doesn't wish to say, that of course is his choice. Due to the nature of our problem self medication is not going to go away, but we can help reduce harm by increasing knowledge.

DonFL (imported) wrote: Mon Jul 23, 2007 10:21 am I'm not intending to talk him into anything, i just would like to know the protocol he used, this will help build the general knowledge base and prevent it in the future. if he doesn't wish to say, that of course is his choice. Due to the nature of our problem self medication is not going to go away, but we can help reduce harm by increasing knowledge.

Ok, this was just me reading things into a post that were not there - sorry!

The protocol I used was hardly extreme, indeed a number of people I spoke to here said I was being rather sedate.

I started with two depo-provera injections (each 150mg, if memory serves) then followed them up every four weeks with a single injection.

TPinot

that is a very common method, i used it my self when i started years ago. I had an anti-depressant though and Dr supervision, i think that makes the world of difference, being under medical supervision. Sorry or your bad experience and i hope you get feeling better soon.

TPinot (imported) wrote: Mon Jul 23, 2007 11:22 pm The protocol I used was hardly extreme, indeed a number of people I spoke to here said I was being rather sedate.

I started with two depo-provera injections (each 150mg, if memory serves) then followed them up every four weeks with a single injection.

TPinot

One of the more famous proponents for the proper treatment of male Hypogonadism in the UK discribed very similar issues after he had a bilateral for cancer. I think (based on what I've read) that depression is more common then not. And self destructive attempts fairly common as well. I'm glad you are OK and wish you success in getting back on healthy levels of Testosterone. Have you talked to your MD about the anti androgens? They may have some way to get you back on your feet faster and it might help you get out from under all the shrinks.

I don't think I was really plagued that much with depression from the Androcur. But I glad that you are getting help. I do know others that have had some real mental issues in castration.

Many thanks to everyone for their concern. Just to let you know I am just out of the psychiatric ward. Still feeling pretty miserable, but not quite so suicidal anymore.