I have been on Depo for about 5 weeks, taking a shot about every two weeks. I no longer get spontaneous erections, and now when I ejaculate there is a lot more volume, just more watery. I am completely happy with the lower libido.

Now to my main concern. I am worried that it is having feminzing effects on me. My whole life I have wanted to be a woman, but in the last couple of weeks it has been stronger than ever. My wife came home with some hickeys and I flipped out. I feel like the man that I was pretending to be died. No more aching heart.

I have been dressing the role 3-4 time a week now. I am moving to California in two weeks and will start seeing a counselor to make sure this is for real. It is the fear and little bit of man left in me keep trying to convince me that it will be to hard to tranistion, that and the guilt from my wife (yeah like it wasnt over before). But I plan to start dressing like a woman most of the time when I move. I have pretty much told my Mom that I want to be a girl with out telling her directly, talking in my girls voice/referring to boy/chick pants/have let her know that I definatly hate being a man and I hate my balls. She says she accepts me for who I am and that she always wanted a daughter. She just thinks I need to get away from the redneckville I am at now.

So now my main question. Could depo alone have this feminizing effect on me? Is this just the womancoming out because the testostorone is being suppressed? Did the death of my fake male persona speed the process along?

Lowering your testosterone could be giving you the stronger gender feelings. If you are moving to the Los Angles area I can recommend ELISE TUREN, Ph.D. at: http://www.lagendercenter.com/ She was very helpful and understanding helping me. It's great your mom is so understanding. If you have to go down this road, it's better to do it before you have had a family. Good luck

I was on depo for several months prior to my castration. I was taking it because androcur had some adverse side effects I couldn't handle.... I had a hard time breathing while taking androcur.

I took the shots for about 3-4 months before I got tired of the ups and downs of the shot. Then, I switched over to the pills for a month or two until my surgery date came up.

I can say that the few months I was on the depo my breath developed more than than any other time. That wasn't what I was going for.

I still have noticeable breast. so I can say in that regard it does have more femininity. As far as behavior, I can't say I noticed much. A few friends did mention to me that since starting androcur I have been more docile / less agressive than prior. I could (and still do) handle problems better with more of a level head then ever before.