I have been interested in ball torture and castration for some time. I fantasize about it constantly. When I can, I find guys who are willing to bust my balls by squeezing, kicking, punching, weights, etc., and play castration games. The ball torture is great but the games are just that--games. They don't seem to take it seriously, and also I cannot bring myself to insist on it.

I need help overcoming my reluctance and in getting people to be serious about it. In my heart I know I want and wish for it, but I seem to get cold feet. Suggestions?

In my experience, the cold feet should be listened to until you can overcome them on your own accord. Nobody can help you decided you're really ready. You'll just have to wait until you are.

I know that's not exactly helpful! That's just the way that I've approached it for myself. Helps with the peace of mind if nothing else. "I'll be ready when I'm ready, and when I am, I'll know." Sorry if that's too lame for you, but this kind of thinking really has helped me out quite a bit.

Frankie.

Hi Dean,

Frankie has a very good point here friend, and one I really think should be taken to heart. I realize that you have been playing on the fringe edge for some time now, and that means that you are still not REALLY ready to go all the way with your ideas and desires. That's ok, really it is.

There is a built-in danger factor in all humanity, and when it's tripped, you start to have doubts and find ways to pull out of situations which are less-than acceptable. OK, so you have the desire for castration, that is an acceptable desire - especially in this family. OK, so you have taken the chances to experience the more intimate side of sexual relations, and have gone with the ball-busting and the definately 'not-vanilla' side of sex - that is your choice, and you must be respected for doing so. I congratulate you on your willingness to experiment with a variety of sexual expression.

Ya know Dean, a life without fantasy is a life without any soul. If all you do is the expected and the mundane...all you will receive in return is the expected and the mundane. I think a quote I find best is: "he who goes after what he has always gotten, always gets what he always has." In other words; if all you want is a really complex fantasy, then...go after that fantasy. There is no shame or compromise in fantasy, none at all. If there were, we would all be in very hot water (as the "thought-police" would have us believe!).

Yes, you want to experience the totallity of the castration scene, and you want to make it a thoughtful reallity in your own life. Have you given any thought as to how you are going to do it? Have you read all the reports and medical data assembled here in the Archive, the comments of those who have had it done, and of those who have wanted it done - but can't find either the time, or the money, or the inititive to accomplish it?

OK, I am sounding like a real meddlesome character, but it's because I do care what happens to you (and to the rest of this family also). If you are so far unable (or otherwise uncomfortable physically, or emotionally, or mentally) to further your reallity desires, then...by all means possible...continue with your fantasy, and realize that it may hold more 'reallity' for you than the actual physical procedure would. That is not to put you in a position of saying that your desire is dead and buried.....only placed in a slightly more controllable perspective, and one from which you can move forward and backward at your own will and desire.

Remember, Dean, there are many here who might agree that castration is not all it's cracked up to be, and while there are many others who would disagree with that idea completely.....only YOU will be able to make up your own mind about the benefits, or the disabilities of such a completely irreversible procedure - either by medical means, or by the hand of someone else.

Sometimes we guys have the notion that our little head does the thinking for the big head...and yes...that's usually the way it goes We can't minimize the effects that testosterone has in the male system - ask anyone here what it does to the body...ask our dear friend Kelly2, or maybe A-1 can answer this question....and even better yet, drop a note to Master Waddie Graywolf (since he has a vast store of knowledge in the area of specialized sexual expression).

You will find only love and care for you in the words and thoughts of the family here, and when.....and if........you are finally ready to take that final step into the unknown (saying that because today, EVERYTHING in this area is unknown to YOU from an experience level only)...

everyone here will be cheering you on, and wishing you well - because? It is your knowledgable and fundemental acceptance of the facts as they are which gives you personal permission to act on your desires - with full knowledge and responsibility.

Do I think you will make that decision? I won't hesitate to tell you that it is still in your hands, and you will make the right choice - for YOU, not for others who want it FOR you, but for YOU, and no one else. Even in a Master/Slave relationship, the Master will diligently enquire out the answer to the question: "is this what you really want?" I am positive that the members of the Dom/Sub Fraternity who are members here will agree. You cannot force anyone to do something they really don't want to do. To say that has a disclaimer built into it though, in that the actual statement is that you can't force someone to agree to something unless you get their permission to do it first - otherwise, you have a hostile and very pissed-off subject, and one who will wreck vengence on your head as soon as they get loose!

Enjoy your fantasies Dean, make them as vivid as you want them to be. Have others join you in making them as real as fantasies can be, and relax with the idea that you have something which you can enjoy for as long as you wish - you hurt no one, and no one will hurt you (unless you wish them to, that is... ). You can always decide at whatever time you choose to make the fantasy a reallity....but ONLY after you have the full facts and information, the complete data, and the full realization of the benefits/disabilities and responsibilities each requires. You have to set the limits - and no one can pass those limits without YOUR permission. You have the right, and you have the fun....simple, but effective. It's a common fact: believe it or not, the bottoms have a good deal of control in the relationship....because if they don't show any desire to be on the bottom, the tops won't find them especially attractive in the first place. Talk about symbiosis

Last word. Take your time with this, you have a whole life ahead of you, and one which should include a fair measure of enjoyment and pleasure (sexual and/or otherwise too). If you jump into the frying pan without looking first - expect to be badly burned. If it's a souffle you're looking for...remember: scrambled eggs is what ya get if the fire is too high, and the pan is too hot.

Big hugs and love always!!

Marc

dean (imported) wrote: Wed Jan 16, 2002 9:27 am I have been interested in ball torture and castration for some time. I fantasize about it constantly. When I can, I find guys who are willing to bust my balls by squeezing, kicking, punching, weights, etc., and play castration games. The ball torture is great but the games are just that--games. They don't seem to take it seriously, and also I cannot bring myself to insist on it.

I need help overcoming my reluctance and in getting people to be serious about it. In my heart I know I want and wish for it, but I seem to get cold feet. Suggestions?

My suggestion is that you should shit or get off the pot.

Excuse my bluntness, but you shouldn't come here expecting someone to convince you that losing your balls is the best thing for you. No one can tell you that and it isn't fair to ask. Eunuchs here that have had no choice in the matter will wonder what is wrong with you. Other eunuchs here that had it done because they wanted to have it done will wonder why you are so reluctant. They will also wonder what is wrong with you.

Think of you balls/cock as a dog or cat or some other pet that you have loved and gotten much enjoyment from in the past. Do you hate them enough to have them put to sleep? Are they complicating your life to the point where you NEED to get rid of them?

Or, do you just hate them until AFTER you have had an orgasm?

Maybe, you hate them until you have an orgasm.

Either way, if one of these last two sentences describe what you are feeling it is my opinion that you are suffering form depression to the point of being psychotic. Get thyself to a good doctor and get some anti-depressants before things get worse.

No shit, man. Testosterone can be controlled, but not if you feel so bad that you are at the point of despair.

If what I said has made you angry then good! Take my word for it, angry is much healthier than depressed.

Get a hold of yourself, man. You are in control. Figure out what you want and quit abusing your package unless you are serious about it.

A-1

A-1 (imported) wrote: Thu Jan 17, 2002 9:27 pm My suggestion is that you should shit or get off the pot.

Excuse my bluntness, but you shouldn't come here expecting someone to convince you that losing your balls is the best thing for you. No one can tell you that and it isn't fair to ask. Eunuchs here that have had no choice in the matter will wonder what is wrong with you. Other eunuchs here that had it done because they wanted to have it done will wonder why you are so reluctant. They will also wonder what is wrong with you.

As a eunuch that had it done because I wanted it done, I just wanted to state that this paragrapgh is a gem of writing, and I wish I had written it.