thefraj (imported) wrote: Fri May 12, 2006 4:00 am
I would have posted in this thread sooner too Pinquita, except that - exactly as Tugon said - (and as you probably already know) I wanted to be a eunuch. At the time I wasn't thinking "I want to be a eunuch to be asexual". It was more like "I hate these sexual urges, they just arn't me".
Anyway, I was waiting and see if someone else more similar to yourself would contribute. I can guarantee that we have at least some members sign up who were not eunuchs by choice. But responses can vary depending on who is actively reading or feels like posting.
So far as I understand, puberty can occur at any age - not just in the teens (as transsexuals will know!) I would be really intregued to know why taking Thyroid and Testosterone supplaments won't do the trick. Has your doctor not spoken to you about this?
Whatever you choose to do, I hope you can be happy
Thefraj.
Thanks for your reply. I understand the events that lead you to choose eunuchoidism. I do not judge you nor anybody and respect your decision. I think we are the opposite side of the coin, while you had normal development and chose to change, I did not have normal development, and wish I did.
About puberty and timeframes, puberty starts at about 12 y / age, and ends at about 17 y of age. What it means by "ends", it means that the growing, development, the potential to grow in size and in substance ( like a man and a woman, ea developeing their bodies in line w their sex, hips in women, soft skin in women, broad shoulders in men, narrow hips...etc and heaight, lenght of bones etc) ... is closed. The long bones of the body grow only up to this time in which your center of the bones, closes up. Your bones grow because the center adds more material at this center, so both ends separate and separate, untill this area solidifies and you can grow no more. Same happens w every organ of the body, hearth, lungs, intestines, penis, vagina , etc.....so when puberty ends, it means you can not change what you are at the time of closure, your fate is sealed.
You will change as you grow older, but only change , not grow, no more development.
Thyroid, testosterone, and other hormones will have some effect on you if administered after puberty, but it will only be like maintenance, but you will not be able to modify what was already built up untill your 17th B day. If given thyroid or testosterone or whatever hormone your body is deficient about...at a time prior to the closure time, it will still be able to promote development and growth. The optimum time to start treatment is at 12 to 13 years of age. The later the treatment, the less efective the changes. So if someone discovers he has hypogonadism, and receives therapy at 16 y of age, there will only be about one years's time to change the situation...so the effects will be less dramatic.
Logically, if no treatment is given and puberty closes, there is nothing that science can do today. Perhaps in 100 years, there will be ways to re open that channel, or perhaps there will be monitoring to avoid someone going undetected. What makes me sad, is that, the only time we can do something about it, is when we are young and have no knowledge nor preparation to deal with and treat the situation. We are in the hands of the adults in our lives, and if this adults are ignorant, irresponsible, addicts, unfit parents, or plain cold turkey parents, we get screwed.
By the time I said, something is wrong, I have to see someone, by then, I was told, too late....and I still remember the words of the doctor, telling me, if you would had come here before you turned 17, I would had made you a superman....but there is nothing we can do now......
I felt like the world split open at my feet.... I felt like there was no reason to remain "in the race"... I felt miserable ever since.
Just to make an analogy, if you are having your home built, and, construction begins.....theoretically you have only up untill the home is being build to try any changes and structural alterations. If you go on a vacation to Europe while your hme is been done, and you come back 9 mos after, and find the home ready ,painted and waitng for your furniture, and then you decide you do not like the roof, the height of the bedrooms, the size of the garage....well.....too late.
Still a house could be torn down....usualy it is not done though. With our bodies, there is no tearing down, you keep this "home" untill the end of your life.
I try to deal w it, but it is hard. To know that there was somnething that could had been done, it is not like I was sealed and made to order like this, but there was something that could had been done....and that lost chance is gone.....hurts.
I respect your point of view. Perhaps we are the exact opposite of the coin. When I see a woman, and, I think, she is off limits, life has put a fence in front of me, I can only look at her, but I will never be able to cross that fence, that makes me feel bad. At least you had a chance to choose, I had none. I am happy for you, because, nobody should go through the life I have, I am glad people are happy and find what they want.
Well...I guess I am drifting to another area, thank you for your response, and, I will keep existing, here at the basement of the world, things keep moving too.