Paul Harvey mentioned on his radio show about a recent incident where somebody shoplifted a lobster by stuffing it down his pants. It took ER quite a long time to remove the lobster, but he said that it successfully gelded the man.

I've heard stories about people doing this. The most famous incident was featured in a Darwin Awards book.

Nonetheless, zats gotta hurt.

"The weed of crime bears bitter fruit" -- "The Shadow knows"