Yoli here (on FUBG's ticket)
Ashleigh and I are spending some pleasant time almost every night in the expansion of a fantasy. It all stems from a weird dream I had a few weeks ago and is now in the "draft/outline" phase. I thought I'd share it with you and ask if anyone finds it interesting or if anyone has ever had a similar idea.
Basically, the dream went somewhat like this:
I'm driving along a highway, in the wee hours of the night, and come upon a state(?) police cruiser and two other vehicles, one a nice little coupe and the other some sort of EMS-looking thing, pulled over on the side of the highway. For some reason, I stop and approach the trooper who is leaning against his car, smoking a cigarette (Marlboro, of course. After all, this IS Texas!) He says "Good Evenin', Miss. May I help you?"
I respond by asking if there's been an accident or some sort of medical emergency. He blushes and replies "I guess you might say it's medical, but not an emergency." I say, "Well, then why the EMS?"
He replies, "Well, that's not exactly an EMS vehicle, although it's equipped a little like one." At this point I hear a female weeping in the little rice-rocket and finally ask the trooper just what IS going on.
"Ma'am," he says,"That is one of the new vehicles the state uses to effect 'on the spot' justice for sexual offenders if we catch 'em in the act out here on the road." "What do you mean?", I ask.
"Little lady (which would piss me off if the trooper wasn't such a cutie), there's a feller in there that's going to come out minus something he went in with." "Huh?", I say.
"OK, then, I can tell you aren't going to give up on this, so I'll give you a quick report.", says my new lust object, "Seems I caught that ol' boy down that little dirt road over yonder. He had an underage female with him and was, well, enjoying some illegal hanky-panky with her." I say, "You mean sex, I assume." "Yes, ma'am, no other way to put it." responds the trooper.
"OK, so what does this EMS lookalike have to do with it? Did you have to hurt him?", I ask. "No, but he's being hurt now. After I cuffed him I called in the report and they sent that vehicle out here to 'fix' the problem.", replies my hero of the moment.
"Look, it's 2AM, I've been driving for hours, and I'm a little slow just now. Is this a mobile JP court or something?" I mutter. "OK, OK." says the trooper. "He's in there being castrated for having sex with a minor."
"WHAT?" I shriek. "Are you kidding me?"
"No kidding about something like that, ma'am, he's probably already lost 'em and is being sewn up, or whatever they do."
To be continued...maybe.
Anyway, just imagine if there were such vehicles that were called to the scene of sex offenses! One variation (credit Ash for it) is that the vehicles also make "house calls" when a guy's appeal of a castration sentence has been denied. Imagine hearing a knock at the door and seeing one of those parked before your home, LOL, and the neighbors beginning to assemble, knowing exactly what it is there for. Oh, the shame of it all! LOL!
Well, back to fixing breakfast. Up too darned early, but Ash and I are off to pick up a friend at, of all things, the Greyhound Station...Geez! Then we are driving to Rockport for three days at the coast!
Yolanda
The Deranged Lady in San Antonio
archetypical young 20-something school teacher with the adolescent boys.
A-1 
) ice cream! We shared a Marlboro Light and then hit the road.