On Seeking counseling and medical options

[jemagirl (imported)]

On Seeking counseling and medical options:

I thought I would start this thread not only to get more information for my self(more is better than less) but also for others with similar interests.

I want to hear from people who have gone through or are in the process of counseling and surgery to achieve their various goals. i.e. transgendered m2f, f2m, nullo, eunuch, as well as any others not mentioned here. There are many great posts through out the archive and many of them touch on this subject. The idea here is to find out what works best when approaching Doctors, Nurses, Sphyciatrists, gender counselors with concerns that may fall beyond the confines of the currently accepted paradigm.

Here are just a few questions to get your grey matter percolating. Hopefully you will think of others.

1) What has work for you?

2) What has not worked?

3) If you experience was negative what

would you do differently

in the future?

4) What advice would you give to others?

Jema

[Iwtbaw (imported)]

That is a very good question JemaGirl, I allso desire to know what approch works best when dealing with conselors. I don't want to make a mistake.

[An Onymus (imported)]

I personally have never had anything to do with counselors, but I have had a lot of contact with people who are supposed to be "experts," and I would think the same principles apply in dealing with counselors as in dealing with others who are supposed to be knowledgeable in their fields. The important thing to understand, is that most "experts" aren't really experts regarding most of the area of knowledge they work in. They were trained to take a certain point of view, and they are only "experts" in dealing with situations consistent with that point of view, or in trying to impose that point of view on situations where it isn't applicable. That is to say, the "experts" aren't really credible most of time, and trust in them is often misplaced. It is a very good idea, to do a little research on the field involved, before you have any contact with an "expert," so you at least have in mind the general framework of the field in which the person supposedly has expertise, before he starts presenting his ideas to you.

Another thing to remember, is that people who are considered experts, and I would suppose that this applies especially to counselors, are continually trying to take control, and to maintain control, when they deal with other people. You're probably better off in counseling, if you resist that, let the counselor see that you don't go along with everything he says, and force him to deal with you as an equal.

[jemagirl (imported)]

Thank You every one,

I'm glad I started this thread. There replies have bee very helpfull. Even though peoples experiences and needs are so different from one another, it seems like there are some comon themes emerging. I especialy like Krister's comment about thinking of this as a product or service and not putting up with sub par performance. I also like An Onymus observation about experts limmited point of view.

Thank You

Jema

[sag111 (imported)]

Well Jema i am going to see my urologest next month and i to am seeking answers so anything i learn from this thread and mine I will take all the sugestions with me when i see him for castration and yes thanks for this post Jema we all have things we need to learn

[Christina (imported)]

I find that being open and honest has worked well with my relationship with a therapist. The ability to listen to you, as well as you listening to them, goes far in having mutual respect for each other. Be persistant but not over demanding. Don't set your expectaions too high. Have as much knowledge before you talk with them so you can make clear decisions about what you may expect to gain in dealing with them. As Krister says, they are working for you, so you want them to understand you and your needs. In the first session you have with a therapist, many questions will be asked, by them as well as you. You have hired them to help you so you need to ask if they have helped anyone else in your situation, as well as if they can help you in your situation.

It may seem difficult at first to talk openly, I know it was for me, but these things must be talked about to insure that both you and the therapist have a clear idea of what each of you expects to gain. There is also going to be many details to work out as time goes on, so don't in the first time as a bleeding heart and spill you guts. The initial meeting should clearly get the point across as to why you are there and how they can help.

[jemagirl (imported)]

Well Jema i am going to see my urologest next month and i to am seeking answers so anything i learn from this thread and mine I will take all the sugestions with me when i see him for castration and yes thanks for this post Jema we all have things we need to learn

Hi Sag,

I hope every things works out. Some how I cant see how they could turn you down. Youve come so far all redy and no one can say that you are doing this impulsivley. I'm sure you will have plenty to add here after youve achieved your goal.

Your Friend

Jema

[jemagirl (imported)]

I think your rite Christina.

I have spent the better part of my life trying to make my self believe I didn't want this. Finally, after being honest with my self, I am beginning to make progress, and having found this place where being different is OK, I am gaining the currage to open up to others out side the EA. I have received much good advice and support here. I hope one day I can help others in the same way.

Jema

[Chibiabos (imported)]

I know, I'm trying to draw blood out of a stone, but any advice for someone struggling to make ends meet, needing to tack down a job but unable to get insurance?

At the moment, I have no job, no unemployment and no insurance (no help from the state). This will change soon one way or another, but if I manage to get a job which I *need* to keep going with my school at a minimum (and try and become independent again instead of continuing to leech off my parents), I'll lose whatever I get from the state.

There is stuff I *need* to have taken care of, namely my migraine, anxiety and depression all of which I have already had diagnosed when I had state coverage I lost very quickly when I moved and managed to find a job. I have not had any regular access to medical nor mental health care since I dropped off my parents' policy when I was 18.

-- Chibiabos

[sag111 (imported)]

Well Deirdre you look sooooooooooo good just like i knew you could.I just think you are so beautiful i cant wait to see your next pic want a date