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Sex Riddles

Posted: Mon Nov 10, 2003 6:20 pm
by Robby (imported)
Hope you enjoy some of these as I do...

1. What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes?

Goes-in-tight.

2. What does a 72-year-old snatch taste like?

Depends ...

3. What's "68"?

You do me and I owe you one.

4. What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

Gagged!

5. What do you call a man who cries while he masturbates?

A tearjerker.

6. Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life?

Because if you'll eat that stuff, you'll eat anything.

7. How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?

Just one, but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out!

8. What's the definition of a vagina?

The box a penis comes in.

9. What two words will clear out a men's restroom?

"Nice Dick!"

10. What do you call a truckload of vibrators?

Toys for Twats.

11. Why do we have orgasms?

How else would we know when to stop?

12. What's the definition of indefinitely?

When your balls are slapping up against her

ass, you're in ... definitely!

13. Define Transvestite:

A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary!

14. What do a dildo and soy beans have in common?

They are both used as a meat substitute.

15. What do you call kids born in whorehouses?

Brothel sprouts.

16. What is every Amish woman's private fantasy?

Two Mennonite.

17. How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?

His hand caught fire.

18. Why is sex like a game of bridge?

You don't need a partner if you've got a good hand.

19. What do you call a smiling Roman with pubic hair between his teeth?

Gladiator.

20. Why do you get paid more at the Sperm Bank than at the Blood Bank?

Sperm is handmade.

21. How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?

Put a nipple on it.

22. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down and use a lubricant

😄 😄 😄

Re: Sex Riddles

Posted: Mon Nov 10, 2003 7:20 pm
by Paolo
Robby (imported) wrote: Mon Nov 10, 2003 6:20 pm 17. How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?

His hand caught fire.

Reminds of the joke about Pinocchio when he told Gepetto that his girlfriend complained about splinters. The old man suggested sandpaper to take the roughness out. Shortly thereafter, he asks the "boy" about his girlfriend. Pinocchio says they broke up. The old man is stunned. "Why?!" he asks, to which Pinocchio replied, "Well, with the sandpaper, who needs HER?"

One could also add an EA inspired twist - that if he kept up with the sandpaper long enough, old Gepetto would soon be doing some "parts replacements" for him! Or maybe not.

😄