You've heard the line, "It's a dog's life." Well, consider the bear:

If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six

months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could

deal with that, too.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone

who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them, too.

I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS

that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

I wanna be a bear.