Help Wanted

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

She was a very good looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch, but

knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the

newspaper for a ranch hand. Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else

applied, she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have

him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then

one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really

good job and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your

heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

However, one o'clock came and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired

hand. He returned around two-thirty and found the rancher's widow sitting by

the fireplace.

She quietly called him over to her. "Unbutton my blouse and take it off,"

she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. "Now take off my boots." He did

so, slowly. "Now take off my socks." He did.

"Now take off my skirt." He did. "Now take off my bra." Again with trembling

hands he did as he was told. "Now," she said, "take off my panties." He

slowly pulled them down and off.

Then she looked at him and said, "Don't you ever wear my clothes to town

again!"