. . .
eunuchunique (imported) wrote: Fri Nov 22, 2002 11:24 am
I hear too little from people who sought self or street castration (other than as TSers) to be comfortable believing (without test
imony) that "
SplitDik (imported) wrote: Fri Nov 22, 2002 10:44 am
they are at peace and can concentrate on other things in their life.
" I think that result may indeed be a part of the problem with the lack of feedback.
With people I've known with the sort of, uh, "drive" toward some sort of single-minded goal, once the goal is reached the drive toward it is finally dissipated and the "problem" resolved. They no longer have a tremendous interest in reaching that goal, because they have finally reached a point where they are at peace with that portion of their psyche by accomplishing their goal.
One finds this sort of pattern in many endevors, and most certainly amongst our sort of group.
As just small examples: An employee of mine, Scott, married, two teen kids, good job as engineer, late 30's finally reached a point where he could no longer bottle up his feelings that he was in the wrong body and living the wrong life. Scott/Kathleen got involved with real-life and on-line TS groups and was very visible and noticible for a few years.
To make a long story short, Scott transitioned while working for me and post-op Kathleen was a somewhat wild, middle-aged matron who still more or less advertised her transition. After about a year and a half, though, Kath sort of "got over" that tremendous release and excitement and calmed down to being a very nice calm lady whom you might never guess was ever anything else.
These days only those few who "knew her then" or who for some reason must know now are aware. Kath certainly doesn't bring it up. She's no longer involved in any transition groups - she's moved beyond them.
Bill is another example. He's just a castrati, but like many was a constant annoyance about it until he finally reached that point. For several months after "reaching his goal" he was still excited and vocal about it, but quite quickly calmed down and, with his goal now reached, faded into the background. He no longer brings it up and no longer has a need or desire to associate with those who have not yet gotten there. He's calm, relaxed, pleased, and living comfortably for many years now.
I suspect that those who remain "active and visible" in transition groups or interest groups after reaching their goal are really the odd ones (and yes, I include myself).
They possibly have unresolved issues or relish their "15 minutes of fame" or enjoy the notariety. If so, they stay, but eventually even they seem to finally wear out.
Myself, I've always been a trainer and resource person. Aside from being a damned fine engineer

I ran seminars for our newer engineers, wrote tech manuals, helped establish national standards, taught classes, and was the person whom many came to to ask the oddball questions that others were either to busy to answer or didn't have an answer for.
I've followed somewhat the same path in my "transition."
Even I, though, have withdrawn quite a bit from the transition and/or interest groups - the interest just isn't here for me anymore. My reason for still being around at all is to pass on information, to be at least a small resource.
I'm not active 'round here, I'm not involved with any of the activities, I don't know the players anymore. I've been there, done that, got the tee-shirt.
I just haven't burned it.
Yet.
It is getting rather threadbare, though . . .
Bottom line? I think the reason we don't see the long-time-past-transition folks milling about in the groups is that they have satisfied their needs, killed their demons, gained a "normal" life and a good deal of balance, and no longer are interested in what goes on here.
Comments?
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